Under the Open Sky
by Keta97
Summary: Loki and Thor go on one of their usual adventures, but with the discovery Loki made recently, it just might be different from what they are used to. It seems after Loki's heart had been torn apart, it takes much greater force than simple compassion to put it back together. AU Thorki
1. The Set-up

**Author's Note: I don't even... This is my first shipping story! Also known as the fic where Loki and Thor want to jump each other for no reason apart from the fact that it's cute as hell.**

**The Alternation: In this universe the events of the movie never took place. Or most of them, anyway. Loki and Thor did go to Jotunheim and Loki discovered that Odin adopted him and wanted to use him. But Odin never fell into Odinsleep and Thor was never banished.**

**Warnings: It's romantic. You know, the sappy kind. Sunsets and kissing in the rain, here I come!**

**There will be some hints and/or vague desciptions, but nothing overly graphic.**

* * *

**The Set-up**

Thor was sure that Loki was _somewhere_ in the library.

But the problem was that the place was huge and for some reason he never really understood, it was forbidden to yell in there. And then, even if he did call him, Loki most probably wouldn't bother to answer, thus ruining the whole point. Thor was left to wander aimlessly between the shelves until he comes across him on his own.

Naturally this annoyed him. Once, he tried to convince Loki to read anywhere but in the library, so he would be easier to encounter. It resulted in Loki hiding at the strangest places to read a book, until Thor begged him to return to the library.

As he walked down one of the many corridors his eyes fell on a parchment, lying unceremoniously halfway rolled up on the floor. It must have fallen from its place on the shelf and seeing that it was in his way, Thor bend down to pick it up.

At first glimpse he saw that it's a map and he was ready to just roll it up and put it on the nearest shelf when he noticed something.

It was a name, _Swafd_, done in an elegant clear-cut writing just over a small rough painting that may or may not have resembled some sort of building. For a short moment, Thor stood unsure why did the name catch his attention. In the next moment it hit him and he smiled broadly.

The map never reached the shelf. Instead it remained in his hand as he went on with his search...

Discovering Loki just around the next corner a moment later.

"What is it?" asked Loki when presented with the map.

"Do you remember yesterday evening? In the tavern? The story-teller?" demanded Thor, excitement making his eyes sparkle like stars.

Just the previous day they were sitting in one of the taverns that filled the streets of Asgard, drinking and listening to bards like they sometimes did. The night was long and there was nothing to do. It was a custom for travelers and singers to entertain the guests of such places despite the lack of payment offered to them. Some liked to sing old songs that everyone knew; others were making fun of everything and everyone around them and some...

Some told the truth about what they saw in the realms, the beasts they fought and maidens they claimed. Most important were the treasures and artifacts though. Many warriors liked the prospect enough to try and find some, only some of them eventually returning in the role of story-tellers themselves, desperately trying to discourage others from following in their footsteps, uselessly warning them to avoid the dangers. The circle continued, new adventurers were excited about the thrill of danger and the old ones kept telling their stories in hopes that they will lesser the numbers of dead bodies lying in the ancient tombs.

The name Swafd appeared in one such story, told by a seasoned fighter by the looks of him. He told them about a temple called Swafd and a powerful object lost within.

"Yes, I remember," said Loki. "What of it?"

"Guess," said Thor, his excitement slowly fading away at Loki's cold response.

Loki lifted his eyebrows and guessed: "You want to find the crown."

The warrior said that there is a crown made from glass and diamonds to be found that allows its bearer to see and control magical energy in such a manner that the person would be basically invincible. While wearing it, one could manipulate spells used against him even as they were being made, turning them against their creator in a split of a second without even moving a finger.

Of course that the prospect of having such power was tempting, but Loki considered himself smart enough to know that it's way beyond his reach. He definitely wasn't going to undertake all the obstacles the man warned them about to get it.

That was, unless Thor decided he wanted to go and find it. Not out of greed or lust for power but simply for the adventure itself. And also because he was taught by Odin that all powerful relics should be gathered and locked away in the vault, so they won't fall into the wrong hands.

Speaking of Odin, this artifact seemed like something he would like to have in his vault, save under his protection... and right in his hand if he ever should need it. This sounded like a thing he would wish to gain, not simply wait until he will be presented with it out of kindness of some brave traveler.

"I never knew you are capable of doing _research_, brother," said Loki offhandedly, asking '_where did you find it?'_ in the most subtle way possible.

Thor wasn't offended; he laughed: "I just stumbled across it on my way to find you. It was actually right here, behind the corner." He grinned innocently: "It almost seems like it was trying to _reach_ you. I wanted to invite you to a hunt, but this seems like a much better idea. We are meant to go on this quest, brother."

_I agree,_ Loki thought. _But by whom?_

"I think I should have a word with fa- _Odin_ about this before we leave."

Thor threw him a pained look at the correction and Loki wasn't sure if he's expressing disappointment or compassion. But then, Loki told himself, he'd be insulted by both, so perhaps it didn't matter. Thor would always be his brother, despite the terrible truth that Loki discovered a few weeks past, but Odin no longer deserved the title of his father. It was just hard to stop addressing him that way out of habit.

"Alright," answered Thor, trying his best to put on an unconcerned tone, even though he couldn't push the image of Odin and Loki screaming at each other out of his mind. "I'll talk to the Warriors Three and ask them if they wish to come with us."

But Loki was no longer listening, his mind already far away.

* * *

He watched Odin from afar for about fifteen minutes, trying to decide if he should encounter him. The Allfather was talking with his court diplomats, too caught up in the whole matter to notice Loki. And that was probably a good thing.

Loki's first instinct was to go and tell him. To Hel with all the subtlety and tact. He would just walk right up to Odin and tell him what he thinks about his mind games. He would laugh and tell him that he doesn't need further proof to know that the beloved Allfather is a liar, deceiving his son and manipulating him his entire life, not stopping even after he's been called out on it.

But then as he watched on he realized that it wouldn't help him.

It didn't matter how much he wanted Odin to stop lying to him, it would never happen. It seemed Odin was born a manipulator. If Loki encountered him now, throwing his actions in his face, it wouldn't make him stop. It would make him cautious. It would make him more subtle and harder to call out. He would _profit _from it.

And Loki didn't like the prospect of being controlled without _at least_ knowing about it. This way he was given the power of knowledge. And he would decide to follow though with Odin's wishes because it would be the only way to keep Odin calm and confident, allowing him to make more mistakes.

It wasn't as if this was the first time something like this happened either. Loki was very used to staying quiet and taking advantage of mistakes people around him made. The problem was that after discovering Odin's greatest lie of all he thought it might finally end. They might finally show their cards to each other, even if it meant admitting their hate. There hardly seemed a reason to hide. Loki was a tool to Odin.

And, to be fair, so was Thor.

Everyone was a tool to Odin. They were all just his chess pieces and for the longest time Odin believed he rules them alone. That was, until Loki grew old enough to start playing a similar game, without knowing that there already is one chess master, who doesn't feel like sharing his chessboard. And so it happened that Loki's life was the subtlest of tortures, everything crafted just so to crush his spirits, his pride, to make him no one and nothing, so he would never dare rise up against his ruler.

In theory, it was flawless. If it wasn't for the accident that made him find out the truth, Loki would still call Odin 'father' and respect him, or pretend to do so, naively believing that all the little hints that pointed to Odin controlling his life are wrong.

Finding out about his heritage simply put it all into perspective.

And yet Odin went on, as if nothing had happened, hoping that they will ensure his power like the good sons they were by finding a powerful relic for him, just like they did with all the other artifacts that filled his vault.

Loki used to believe that it happened at random which story they decided to follow and which treasure they brought back for safekeeping. They were doing it to gather experience or, in Thor's case, to simply have fun. His new perspective told him it was all too convenient.

One of the ambassadors spoke more loudly then the others, his voice reaching Loki though his thoughts: "But the guests will be here tomorrow! How can you be sure that your sons won't cause any trouble?"

Loki didn't need to hear more. Suddenly he felt tired. Tired of the endless game. Tired of the lies.

Odin wanted to get rid of them so they won't interfere in his political meeting, while using them at the same time to gather more power for him. And as the knowledge hit him, he made a decision. He decided he doesn't care what Odin wants anymore. He knew exactly what _he, _Loki wants and for once the two weren't mutually exclusive.

In the end, it was Thor who was right. Perhaps he had an excellent reason to be so cheerful about the adventure. Loki wanted nothing more than to leave the golden halls behind and sleep under the open sky.

He stepped out of his hiding place, approached Odin and waited until he was noticed.

"Loki." Odin's tone was reserved, cold. The argument they have had clearly left marks. Odin expected an attack; and just a few minutes ago he would be right. But instead, what he got was fulfillment of his plans, filling him with arrogant confidence.

"I came to tell you that we're leaving for Vanaheim. We will find the crown of Swafd," was what Loki said. _I need some downtime from trying to unravel your secrets, Odin. Call it your victory if you will, but as long as we're both alive we are far from done, _was what he meant.

* * *

Thor was relieved to see that Loki appears calm, almost relaxed when they met outside the palace gates. He immediately felt smile creeping across his face. All was right in the world after all.

"Everything went well?" he asked needlessly, when they evened out their strides, heading for the sables side by side.

"F- Odin was overjoyed to hear of our plans," answered Loki, once again slipping slightly. It used to make sense to call him 'father' in Thor's presence.

"That's good," replied Thor plainly. For a moment he wanted to express his gratitude that they didn't argue or downright fight each other but then he decided to would be better not to push it. It was a few weeks since already, but he still wasn't sure how to feel about the whole accident.

A few days ago, he asked Loki if he were happier if they never went to Jotunheim and everything stayed the same. Thor felt that it was him and his decision to go on adventure that created this rift between Loki and Odin. But his younger brother looked at him and told him that he's glad to know the truth.

It was hard to believe him, seeing the pain in his eyes, but then who knew to right answer to the _hurtful truth versus pleasant lie_ question? Thor wasn't a philosopher and he could definitely understand the need for truth. The problem was that the lies didn't seem so bad when they were only there to protect Loki from feeling different. Loki seemed to see something more meaningful in the fact that Odin lied to him, but Thor didn't know what it was.

"The warriors won't be coming with us," he said after a short while. "Sif said she's not interested and the Three weren't exactly feeling up for anything, because they seemed to have overdone it with drinking yesterday. Who knows what they were celebrating. Fandral told me to leave him alone, Hogun claimed he's going to die and I didn't manage to wake up Vostagg." He smiled sheepishly and Loki snorted.

"Wonderful," he said. This was either excellent or going to get them killed. Loki never enjoyed the company of the other warriors, so he was glad that they won't be coming, but in battle at least one more sword between him and the enemy was always welcome. Six people seemed the perfect number for a raiding party, two not so much.

The servants had their horses prepared for them. Loki told himself he's not interested in how could they possibly know about their plans so long beforehand. Though he supposed Odin just as well might have stood on his balcony and bid them a heartfelt goodbye with a handkerchief in hand.

He realized how bitter he is about all this only when he almost forgot to return Thor's smile, when his brother turned back in saddle to look at him. Then he reminded himself why he's doing this. For fun. Just for once in his life he wouldn't try to prove anything and he wouldn't plan anything. He would just have a good time.

"Am I the only one always wondering, why is Heimdal's observatory so out of hand?" called Thor to him, as they cantered though the golden city in the direction of the huge rainbow bridge.

Luckily, Thor never lacked the ability to lighten up his mood.

"Clearly, it's because Bifrost is a runway for spaceships and Heimdal is the conductor," he called back.

"Really? I never thought about it that way. Do you know what _I _think Bifrost is?" Thor was smiling so broadly, so mischievously, that Loki found it hard to resist. His own smile had long back stopped being a mask and turned genuine.

"What?" he asked, adjusting his movements as his mare took up speed, shoulder to shoulder with Thor's.

"A race track!" called Thor, laughing as his white stallion suddenly shot forward in a burst of speed, easily getting ahead of Loki's brown mare. Loki laughed too and immediately urged his own horse to go faster.

They flew over the ocean, colorful sparks igniting around the stomping hooves falling on the rainbow bridge, the ever-present stars shining in the infinite sky above them. The air was rushing past them, its howling mixing with the thunder of shattering waves and creating a symphony of freedom.

Loki managed to catch up to Thor and for a while they rode side by side, both trying their hardest to gain advantage over the other, neither succeeding. Their horses galloped at the top of their speed.

The observatory was closing up on them and as they passed the last pair of pillars they both realized they should slow down and stop. Reluctantly they did so, ending up next to each other just like they began. The adrenalin slowly faded away and their heart beats returned to normal.

"Well," said Loki as they dismounted. "That was uneventful." Thor grinned at him.

Heimdal was standing were he always stood, staring into the distance; completely oblivious to their shenanigans. They approached him, leaving their horses behind. The guardian didn't greet them and they didn't bother to explain to him where they were going. His eyes pierced them for a few seconds and then he turned and entered the golden observatory.

_Of all the servants, only the one who actually could see us coming didn't prepare for us beforehand, _thought Loki, as they followed him inside.

"It is a long way through Vanaheim, to find the treasure you seek," said Heimdal while they waited for the bridge to open, the chamber filling with sparkling light, as the mechanism woke up its power.

"Is it?" asked Thor without any genuine interest. "We'll manage." The details of the adventure always soared right over his head. Heimdal didn't care to respond and at that moment, the Bifrost opened and dragged them in, pulling them away from Asgard.

* * *

The sky opened and down came a stream of light, striking the ground like a lightning. In the next moment the light was gone and darkness closed upon them. Once their eyes adjusted to the change of scenery they realized they are standing in a forest. The dark trees around them didn't suggest any trace of civilization, much less the enormous Vanir city they only ever visited in the past.

Of course it was a long way through Vanaheim. Just about long enough to keep them away from Asgard for the whole duration of the important political meeting. The bridge could have taken them right up to the temple, but of course it didn't. Heimdal was very loyal to his king.

"Am I the only one always wondering if Bifrost just chooses the final destination at random?" said Loki off-handedly, turning the bitter thoughts into a joke and watching Thor smile.

* * *

**Note: Let's just say that when it comes to Asgard, I'm a conspiracy theorist. (I didn't read the comics or anything, if you're wondering. The theory is mine. You can tell, because it's crazy.)**


	2. A Forest Walk

**Note: Some headcanons ahead, hope you don't mind. **

**Also there seem to be no information about what lives in Vanaheim except for the Vanir gods. So I'm going to make stuff up. Counts as a part of the various headcanons, I guess.**

* * *

**A Forest Walk**

They left Asgard in the middle of the day, but it turned out that the Vanir sun had a system of its own so it was night here. It made them wish they had studied the map when they still had the light to see it. Vanaheim didn't have a moon (or three) like Asgard to give at least a minimum illumination, so they were in a pitch black aside from the distant stars, too small to be of any significant help.

But then again, there wasn't really that much to read from the map either. They were in a forest and Vanaheim was covered in forests.

"Alright, I suggest we find a river," said Loki at last. "If we find it, it will means that we are somewhere around the right edge of the map. If we don't, we are anywhere else."

This was ridiculous. Who knows what huge plans Odin needs to put in motion that he wants to be rid of them for so long.

Thor expressed his agreement with an annoyed grunt and they set off.

* * *

They didn't find a river.

The sky above turned from deep blue into light grey and then orange, as the sun rose up on the horizon. Its light reflected of the surface of two planets in the same solar system, so the Vanir sky was decorated with an enormous purple gas-giant and a smaller golden planet with countless rings around it. To Thor and Loki it might have as well been empty. Not only the forest around them didn't offer a good view of the sky, they would also never bother to look at something so ordinary.

They found something much more interesting instead.

The low hanging branches didn't allow them to see it until they were only a few steps away from it. The forest ended abruptly and they entered a clearing covered in hastily arranged rocks and trunks. A keen eye could recognize ruins of a village. The residents were long gone, as was any trace of civilization. There were no buildings here. All walls have fallen.

They slowly walked pass the debris and Thor once again drew out the map. While his brother was occupied, Loki carefully scanned the scene around them. Something about this place made him fell uneasy, but he wasn't entirely sure what.

"Looks like we're here," announced Thor, pointing with his finger at some place towards the left edge of the map.

For one, why were all the houses torn to pieces? The only thing that suggested that there ever were any houses at all was the placement of the rocks and the shape of the trunks, that wasn't in any way natural. The place could have been abandoned; it could have been put to the torch, but instead it was torn down.

What was this place?

"It was called Hettr while it still stood. How old is this map, anyway?" said Thor.

How old was this place? That was another thing that felt wrong. No matter how ancient and abandoned it seemed, there was one important detail missing. There were no trees here. The forest would have expanded between the stones long ago if it got the chance. The fact that it didn't suggested two options: either the place was cursed or it was destroyed only recently.

Or both. It was hard to decide which one was more likely.

"Do you think there could be something worth while here? Hidden basements with treasure?"

Hardly. If someone took so much time to bring down every single wall, you could be sure they didn't neglect the looting. Unless they were raging bilgesnipes. But it made sense to assume this was done by raiders since no destruction caused by a beast would be so systematic. Assuming that raised the question of reason though. Why would anyone bother doing something like this?

"Loki?"

There was Thor's hand on his shoulder now, though he was sure it wasn't there a second ago. Loki looked at it and assumed the most quizzical expression he could manage.

"You can let go of me. I'm not going to run away."

"No, but your thoughts did."

Loki didn't get a chance to answer because at that moment a shadow fell over them and they heard a shriek. They looked up immediately and at the next moment, they both jumped to the side to avoid a huge winged beast that fell upon them from the sky.

It landed on all fours, wings spread wide. It was twice their height and the clearing bathed in its shadow, as the huge wings covered the sun. The body had feline features to it, slim and elegant, while the wings were similar to bats', all bones and skinny fur. It never stopped shrieking, making it hard to hear or even think, as the sound tore at their ears.

A second after it touched down, it struck. Its paws turned out to be hiding sleek claws, sharp as needles and long as an average sword. It made a move towards Thor.

It was immediately thrown back by Mjölnir that hit it squarely in the jaw. It wavered momentarily, while the hammer bounced right back into Thor's hand.

Loki swiftly made his way though the garnish to Thor's side, deciding at once that his daggers won't be of much use unless he gets to a soft spot. Thor opened his mouth to say something to him, but by that time the beast already collected itself and one of its paws came crashing down on them.

Thor didn't have enough time to throw Mjölnir this time, so he only covered from the blow. For a short moment they stayed that way, the creature pushing down and Thor holding the paw from crushing them with his hands crossed over his head. Then Loki sprung up and pierced the soft skin between the toes with his dagger. The cat wailed and flapped its wings a few times, to lift itself and back away a few steps.

"I don't think we need to fight it," said Loki, raising his voice to be heard over the sounds the beast never ceased to make. "Maybe we should just move along."

"It won't let us pass," objected Thor. He didn't waste any more time and in the next moment, his hammer once again left his hand to hit the creature's chest. But the cat had no plans of suffering it any longer. One blow of its paw send Mjölnir flying to the ground, as Thor's control over it flickered. The hammer disappeared from their sight somewhere amongst the rubble. Thor immediately lifted his hand to call it back, but their enemy was quicker.

This time the cat didn't use claws. It plunged down on them, ready to tear them to pieces with its fangs, glittering in the sun like diamonds. There wasn't enough time to run or jump away.

Loki knew he can teleport a short distance away. The problem was that he couldn't teleport Thor. Naturally that ruled out the course of saving himself. He had no intention to watch Thor being chewed on by this monster. So the next logical step was to stop the attack, saving them both. There wasn't much time to think and only a few choices to make. He vanished.

Only to rematerialize less than a second later high up on the creature's head. The cat moved fasted than him, so he was falling even as he drew his dagger and buried it in the soft skin near the beast's eye. In the next second he was literally catapulted backwards, as the cat reared and shrieked in pain, its skull making a hard contact with Loki's body. He was sent flying though the air, his consciousness flickering out, as his vision swam in red dots of pain.

The beast shook its head from side to side in a futile attempt to get rid of the pain and then, with its wings half-spread and its paws beating uselessly on the ground, it was struck down by Mjölnir, the hammer obediently returning to Thor's waiting hand. The cat fell on one side, some trunks snapping under the weight. For a few seconds it just lay there, stunned. Then it roared again and attacked again, its claws raining down on the remaining warrior.

Thor had just enough time to swing Mjölnir around and parry all the assaults, occasionally managing to shatter one of the claws to the great fury of the beast, but his mind was elsewhere. He didn't see what Loki did but he could easily assume what his younger brother's plan was. The beast's movements suggested a wound on its head. So where was Loki? Why wouldn't he teleport back? Did he decide to wait somewhere in safety until Thor wins the fight? He hoped so, but a certain protectiveness he felt towards Loki filled him with doubt. He wanted to be sure.

His patience was drawing to an end. The cat wouldn't leave him alone, it wouldn't tire. And despite how long the fight seemed, it only lasted about few minutes and all they managed to do so far were all light injuries, just bruises and scratches. This way he would exhaust himself long before he would defeat the beast.

He lifted Mjölnir and allowed it to drag him, pulling him up into the air. He had to quickly sway to one side to avoid a set of claws raised by the cat to bring him back down. Mjölnir guided him through the air, out of reach.

The wings unfolded, flapping swiftly, lifting the cat easily of the ground. Thor swirled in the air, his cape flapping in the wind. It was less of a flight and more of a jump for the beast as it reached his level, not wasting any time and immediately attempting to catch him again. Thor made sure that he's hovering right above the monster, and when its claws soared up to meet him, he rushed down towards them.

The beast panicked and tried to avoid him, overlapping in the air on its back, its wings suddenly useless and clumsy. He hit it hard, tearing it from the sky and sending them both crushing to the ground, Mjölnir making an impact with its chest, stronger then before thanks to the additional speed.

The rocks shattered when they hit them, dust filling the air. The shrieks finally silenced and the beast didn't move anymore.

Thor jumped off the huge body with ease, landing on a path between two separate ruins mostly clear of the debris. The monster was defeated, now he only needed to find his brother.

* * *

Loki's eyes opened slowly and he registered he's not falling anymore. Which, now that he thought about it, was rather strange considering that he never hit the ground...

He shook in a rush panic and he immediately started falling again, as the braches that held him up until now gave way. He crashed to the ground and stayed lying there, hurting too much to move. The sun glared at him though the trees and for a short while he couldn't remember where he is and why he's there.

Then he heard the shriek and remembered. He pulled himself up and looked around, trying to guess which direction are the sounds coming from. They echoed though the forest, indefinable and untraceable.

Then the ground shook as something huge crashed into it and the impact was so loud he knew immediately where to go. He only hoped it wasn't the sound of the beast crushing Thor under its paws... He quickened his steps without even realizing it, rushing to the battle side to make sure his brother was alright, despite the fact that he probably wouldn't be able to help if Thor needed him.

The trees finally allowed him a view of the ruins. He saw the cat lying on its back, one of the wings crooked under the body in an unnatural angle. That meant Thor won. Loki allowed himself to relax and leaned on a nearest tree to catch his breath. His body was quickly recovering from the blow he received and there seemed to be no harm done.

Thor found him a moment later.

"Enjoying the view?" he said, but his teasing tone gave away a trace of relief. He was obviously just as glad to see Loki as Loki was to see him.

"Of course, your handiwork is magnificent to behold."

Thor quickly measured him: "Were you injured?"

"No," answered Loki. He didn't see any injuries on Thor, but he supposed it was something of a custom to ask anyway: "Are you?"

"I'm not. But I was surprised when you didn't return. Did the fight bore you?" Ah, there it was, the worry Thor's tone hinted at before, once again trying to hide behind light teasing.

"Never," Loki smiled. "A swift return unfortunately wasn't a matter of choice on my part."

"So you _were_ injured."

Loki's smile faded away as quickly as it appeared and he snapped: "No need to babysit me."

It wasn't always like this. _It had never been like this._ But the discovery he made recently had influence on more than just Loki's views of Odin. For one, it made Thor way more attentive. Watching your younger brother cry his heart out probably does that to you. Loki hated it. He didn't want to be treated like a glass princess.

Thor almost looked hurt, but he had the decency to stop pushing it. He simply sighed and then they continued their journey, neither meeting the other's eyes.

Now that Loki had time to think about it again, he realized he still doesn't understand. Who destroyed the village? Why did the beast attack them in the first place? Was there a connection between the two?

They left the clearing behind and set out though the forest in their intended direction. Loki didn't lose much time with useless deliberation. After a half-hour of silence he had to admit that he simply doesn't know and there was no way to reason it out.

"I suppose it was some sort of chimera. The village was torn down by it and it attacked us because we invaded its territory, maybe even its nest. But I will never _know_, because you decided to invade Muspelheim a few centuries ago."

"Are you still blaming me for that?" Thor looked at him with an expression of amused annoyance.

Because the fire giants returned the attack and when they started putting Asgard on fire, nearly half of the ancient archives had burned down before the flames were put out. A lot of knowledge was lost on that day including, as it turned out, detailed information about flora and fauna of the nine realms. The basic education they had simply wasn't enough. Asgard's education system focused on producing knights not scientists.

"I'm not sorry," mumbled Thor under his breath.

Actually, scratch that. Asgard focused on producing berserkers, not knights.

Silence overtook them as they walked on. Occasionally they heard birds chirping somewhere in the woods or small felines crossed their path, fleeing at the sight of them. The sun moved though the sky up above them. Trees around them hummed with the wind. The whole world seemed calm and peaceful, the battle long forgotten.

It was about three hours later when one of them decided to break the silence.

"The Bifrost could have saved us all this walking, couldn't it?" asked Thor in a casual tone, probably only to try and chase away boredom. "Feels like we're wasting our time." He addressed the sky, likely thinking of Heimdal.

If Loki didn't know what he knew now, he would make a joke here, perhaps teasing Thor that he thinks any time spend not beating up anything is wasted and the conversation would end, both knowing that they're wasting time but neither bothering to find out why. They wouldn't suspect that their absence may have its reasons. Why would they? It wasn't as if they had many other ways of constructively spending their time, so if a trip took more than a few hours it was only welcome.

"Why would anyone want us to waste our time?" he responded, just as casually, but his thoughts were nowhere near as calm. He suddenly wasn't sure whether he should or shouldn't tell Thor about what was going on.

They crossed a stream that glittered in the sun like liquid silver. The water burbled between stones, clear and cheerful. Thor shook his head and gave Loki a helpless smile.

"Someone thinks we could use the exercise?"

That was the official version, no doubt. It was strange, how fake it seemed now, even though he would believe it just fine a year ago.

He never told Thor what he really thinks about Odin, because he was used to keeping secrets. The world was safer that way. He wouldn't have to worry that Thor will spread the word to unwanted ears. In the very least he spared himself feelings of hurt and betrayal if Thor refused to believe him. It made sense to keep quiet, like he always did.

"I guess so," he answered and just like that, the chance at talk passed.

But the need to speak didn't pass with it. It stayed, burning deep inside him, as Loki realized he wants to trust his brother and wants to share his secrets with him. He only needed to wait for the right time to tell him.

* * *

As they walked, the forest around them slowly grew ticker, the trees closer together, the undergrowth wilder. The sun was lost to them long ago, hidden behind the many branches clinging over their heads. It created strange grim atmosphere, darkness during a day. Soon enough the various plants and trees closed on them in such a way that it was like creeping through a tunnel. Low hanging branches made them bow their heads and various bushes made every step hard, some of them catching their clothes with thorns and not letting go until they reached for them and tore them away.

Thor was in the lead, not hesitating to break any branches that stood in his way. Loki followed in his steps taking the advantage of having the way cleared for him. They progressed slowly, despite Thor's best attempts and Loki lazily wondered if he could find this place on the map.

Then they stopped progressing completely. For the last few steps was Thor literally fighting with the forest to let them pass and it looked like the forest finally won. Brightly green vines that covered the trees for the last few miles tangled here with the bushes and created an impassable green web. Thor tried to break through by hitting it with Mjölnir, but the vines were soft and flexible, so they didn't shatter at the impact like branches did.

Thor tried it a few more times, but the plants stubbornly stood their ground, Mjölnir harmlessly bouncing off of them. Loki quietly watched this for a little while and then unsheathed his dagger.

"Allow me." Thor looked at him, the doubt present in his gaze clearing away only at the sight of the weapon. Then he stepped back and let Loki slip past him. There wasn't much space to move, but they paid it no heed, neither of them minding how close to each other they are standing.

The dagger effectively cut the vines and slowly a way opened in front of them, allowing them to start moving. Sometimes, Loki cut though the plants and Thor dealt a blow that made the disrupted web fall to pieces. This way they worked side by side, making their way slowly on and on.

"What's its name?" asked Thor suddenly, as he watched Loki work.

"How should I know? I didn't study Vanir flora and if you think hard enough you might even remember why," answered Loki in his usual way.

Thor snorted at being once again reminded of that old incident. "I didn't mean the plant. I meant your weapon."

Loki stopped to shoot a quick glance at his dagger. This one was his main weapon, different from all the little ones he carried hidden away on various places like sleeves and boots. And it was definitely something else than his throwing knives. It was carved with runes around the handle similar to Mjölnir. Loki looked at it, then at Thor and then returned to work.

"You don't know?"

The second the words passed Loki's lips, Thor's eyes fell to the ground, his expression shameful. "It just- It slipped my mind. You so rarely use it when you speak about your weapon..."

There it was again. Loki almost regretted the question now. Thor was scared that he will hurt Loki's oh-so-fragile feelings if he openly admits he doesn't pay close attention to every little detail about his younger brother. It seemed that no matter what Loki does, Thor will forever see a porcelain doll in him. How could he ever hope to be seen as equal!

"You're right. I rarely use it. It's called Sannindi."

Thor's expression suggested that he never heard of it before. "You call your weapon 'Truth'?"

"Not every name can be as poetic as 'Crusher'."

"Mjölnir is a fine name!" Luckily it seemed that Thor quickly found his way back into their usual banter, his protectiveness no longer holding him back. "A weapon's name should strike fear in the hearts of your enemies. Why would you name your weapon 'truth'?"

The vines fell as Sannindi sliced though them and Loki wouldn't meet Thor's eyes when he responded. "Truth is a terrifying thing. It doesn't just cut you or crush you. It _devours _you. It can reach the deepest depths of you, of who you think is you, and it destroy them. It doesn't crush your bones or make you bleed; it ruins your heart and mind in a way that can never heal. It's poisonous so even the smallest cut will eventually infect your whole body. There's no escape from it. You can try avoiding it, running from it, but in the end it will always catch up to you. Nothing has as much power over life as truth does."

Thor was silent and Loki didn't dare to look and see his expression.

"How's that for striking fear in the hearts of my enemies?" he added in a bright, teasing tone. When he felt Thor's arms enveloping him from behind, he froze, letting his arms droop to his sides.

"Loki," spoke Thor gently to his ear. "Does it still bother you so much? We will always be brothers, no matter what you call the truth." He pressed him closer to his chest in an attempt to comfort him. Loki avoided his searching gaze, staring blindly on the ground.

It felt good to be comforted. But some part of him screamed that he should be insulted and move away. He didn't want to be the weak little sibling.

Or so he told himself. The weak ones die. He was thrown away at his birth because he wasn't strong enough. He wasn't going to admit that he isn't as strong as he should be. It didn't matter how much he yearned for the safety of Thor's arms. He was still trying to dance away, to deny it, because that was what he did. He was a liar. The more he understood the truth, the more it terrified him and made him want to run away from it.

"And by the way I know you just made that up," said Thor not unkindly. "Your dagger wasn't always named Sannindi."

But all lies and illusions were eventually seen through.

Loki finally turned to him, grinning impishly. "Maybe. But if you don't immediately let go of me, I'll stab you with it and it's not going to be a lie."

Thor reluctantly loosened his arms and Loki pushed them away, returning to his work without a second glance. Thor watched him, not daring to speak, to voice his thoughts.

He felt helpless. There was nothing he could do to help Loki, no matter what he did. His words were clumsy whenever he tried to be supportive and comforting. All he could do was repeat old words, phrases he already said too many times to have any effect. As Loki had said, the truth infected the deepest parts of his heart. Thor was convinced that he could never reach there. Loki would never let him, after all. And even if he would, what then? The fact that Thor wanted to protect him didn't change anything. It couldn't save Loki. The truth would _always_ hurt him whether Thor was there or not. Or so it seemed, judging from Loki's reaction. He seemed to scream with every glare and movement that that all Thor's best attempts are useless in helping to heal his wounds.

But there didn't seem to be any other way and Thor refused to let his brother be devoured, whether it would be by truth or plain self-loathing. He would never give up on Loki, no matter what it took. So he was going to keep trying, to whatever end.

The vines were finally gone and they could continue. The darkness around them slowly gave way to the usual dimmed light under the trees as they left the tick part of the forest behind and the way between the trees once again opened up before them. They went on side by side and after a while they even managed to find something to talk about, abandoning the hurtful silence.


	3. Struggles

**Note: I tend to switch a lot between perspectives as I'm trying to keep up with both of them. Hope it doesn't make the story confusing.**

* * *

**Struggles**

The sun disappeared behind the horizon and only the two planets stayed, reflecting the last of its light before they too hid in shadows and the sky drowned in darkness. The princes decided to settle down for the night.

They didn't need a fire for warmth, but it served to keep away wild animals. They gathered some fallen branches and stones to secure it. When they were done building a fire place, Loki leaned close to the wood and a spark of magic from his fingers set them aflame.

"Why do you never use that in battle?"

Loki looked up. Thor was grinning at him from across the flaring camp fire. "You mean the spark?"

"You could set your enemies on fire! Don't tell me it works only on wood."

Trust Thor to use everything in battle. In his eyes, things that weren't useful in battle probably served no purpose whatsoever.

"It's only a spark," explained Loki. "It's good for lightening candles or igniting small fires, but it would immediately flicker out in the rush of battle."

He saw the question in Thor's eyes.

"No, I'm not going to learn to throw fire balls," he answered with a smirk.

Thor grinned: "Why not?"

"It's impractical. Overly dramatic storytellers made it up, but no sane person would ever use it in battle."

Thor couldn't argue with that, since he wouldn't know. He put away the most uncomfortable parts of his armor and then lied down on his back, his arms crossed behind his head.

"I really hope we'll find the crown," he said off-handedly, staring up at the starlit sky.

Loki also allowed himself a more relaxed position, lying on one side, supporting himself on one elbow. "Having doubts is unlike you."

Thor turned to him, grinning: "If we don't, I will be furious that I had to suffer walking all the way there for nothing. Maybe then next time Heimdal will consider giving us a short-cut."

Loki returned the grin, wishing it would all be so simple.

* * *

_He found himself in a cold, dark hall. It was snowing in there, despite the fact that it was indoors and there were no windows. He was alone and there was no way to go except forward._

_He was running, though there was no need for it. The light at the end of the corridor was getting closer on it's own accord, one moment close enough to reach, the next barely visible in the distance._

_And then even as it was only a mere spark at the distant end of the hallway, he reached it, suddenly, like being teleported. He was in a large room and he wasn't alone anymore. When he saw his company, he wished he was._

_The room was filled with dark, muscled creatures, with strange markings covering their faces and naked chests. Frost Giants. None of them raised their blood-red eyes to meet his gaze._

_"You," said someone. "Kneel."_

_He looked up to see Laufey sitting above them all on his throne. The smirk he wore didn't look right on his face._

_Loki hesitated a moment longer than he should have._

_Laufey's face changed and he was staring at his own face, with blue skin, markings and those horrible crimson eyes._

_"Kneel," said Loki, the King of Frost Giants, and Loki, the Rebellious Prince, moved to kill him, only to find himself kneeling obediently._

When he woke up, he couldn't remember what he had been dreaming about. Not that it mattered. His dreams were lately just as frustrating as reality. He turned to one side, to face the forest and forced his eyes closed, wishing he would fall asleep again.

He eventually had to give up, his tangled thoughts not allowing him to rest. He got up and put on his armor. Oft times he did it with his magic, but this time there was no need to rush, seeing that Thor was still asleep.

The sky was a dark shade of grey, slightly lighter towards the east side. The sun wasn't up yet. Loki moved around the burnt-out fireplace, with the full intention of waking Thor up, so they could start moving again.

Then he stopped. There was something about the picture of sleeping Thor... He seemed so calm and peaceful, his tangled golden hair partly covering his face. Loki found himself fascinated by the sight.

Thor didn't look like some sort of sleeping beauty, innocent maiden, pristine and untouched, oh no. Loki throughout his life saw many of such ladies, all of them soft and gentle. All requiring protection and care. It made him want to spoil them, but it never made him feel respect the way this particular sight did.

Perhaps what charmed him was how steady and solid the peaceful aura around Thor seemed. A resting warrior. He seemed so powerful and enduring. Like the only thing in universe that could be relied upon.

He realized that he isn't even aware of how long he's been standing there, staring at Thor. He didn't feel like breaking the moment, suddenly too shy to look into Thor's eyes. Surely Thor would somehow read from his face everything Loki thought about him... More often than not Loki believed it must be so. And yet everyone deemed him an excellent liar.

The sun peaked over the horizon.

Thor moved, shielding his eyes with one arm and murmuring quietly. It suggested he's either dreaming or awoken. Loki bet on the latter. He quickly made his way back on the other side of their small camp. He had no intention being caught staring and explaining that Thor woke up before he managed to reach him just seemed needlessly complicated. Pretending was so much easier.

It didn't take long for Thor to give up the fight, the light inevitably won, and he stopped trying to fall back asleep. He opened his eyes and found Loki with a thoughtful expression, sitting next to the fire ashes.

"Good morning," said Thor to make Loki aware of his wakefulness and his younger brother turned to him and smiled, returning the phrase.

Thor put on his armor, wondering if they should bother with breakfast or simply skip the meal and bother with hunting only for lunch. Sometimes, they ignored food altogether, the adrenalin keeping them going, so they did a whole adventure without eating and then held a feast after they returned. But it only worked that way with shorter adventures, the ones that took couple of days at most. If Heimdal's words were any indication (and they were, considering that Heimdal wouldn't bother to warn them unless the problem was noteworthy,) this was going to be longer.

"Later," said Loki when faced with the question. So they set off without any delays. The rays of the waking sun slipped between the trees for once not held back by any branches. The whole forest shone like the golden halls of Asgard. Loki wasn't sure if it's impressive or if the comparison makes him feel weary.

Thor was humming a tune as he walked. Loki was quiet, listening, trying - simply out of boredom - to place the melody. The fact that it seemed to constantly skip between rhythms wasn't exactly helpful. He was just about to ask what the song was, without any actual hope for a real answer, purely to evoke a conversation, when he noticed something.

The trees around them were mostly overgrowth with other plants, their barks more green than brown. At the second when he looked up Loki saw on one of the trees a particular spot that was neither. The spot was coal black, rotten and dried.

It was under eye level, so Loki stopped and crouched to get a better look.

"What is it?" asked Thor curiously and came closer to see. He didn't get an answer.

Loki felt a tug of magic, when he touched the spot. It was unlike anything he ever felt before, but that didn't necessarily mean it was unknown to him. He reached for it with his own power. His perception of touch expanded beyond his fingers and soon he felt a whole web of energetic field that made up the trees spiritual power. It flowed from the roots to all braches and leafs. In this particular place, though, there was a disruption in the flow, like a knot on a rope.

Loki read about this kind of spell though neither he nor any of his tutors ever used it. The effect was similar to what a limited amount of specific poison does to flesh - shuts down body functions.

"Loki," called Thor, annoyed at being ignored.

Loki looked up to him.

"What is it?" repeated Thor.

For a moment, Loki searched for words to explain it to him. Thor never quite understood how energy works. "It's disrupting magic. Someone prevented the tree's energy to pour into this place of its trunk, so it slowly died away."

"The tree is alive, but part of it, right in the middle of its trunk, died?" asked Thor skeptically. "Because of magic?"

"Yes."

Thor bent down to look at and touch the spot too. "It's weird," he decided. "But is it important?"

"I just stated that it was done by someone, didn't I?" answered Loki, his expression thoughtful. "It means that we are not alone here, though it's been a while since the spell was cast."

"And I was starting to think that this day will be boring," said Thor, smiling blissfully.

Loki shot him an amused glance and then turned back to the tree. Once again he reached out, feeling the energy and where it was lacking. For a moment he wondered if he should break the barrier. He felt it, it wouldn't be too hard. Only a bit of his own energy to add an extra push to the tree's own powers and he could open the way.

But even before he was done thinking about it, he knew it would serve no purpose. The wood was already dead and there was nothing that could bring it back to life now. It was entirely possible that he would hurt the tree by leading its energy there. If he had come earlier, he would have been able to heal the wound, but at this point there was nothing to do.

"Let's go," he decided. "There's nothing more to see."

They set off and after a short while, Thor started humming again, but Loki paid no more heed to it, his mind preoccupied with speculations about the mysterious spell-caster.

* * *

A slim brown hare slipped from between the ferns. The forest was quiet save for a couple of birds that chirped somewhere in the trees. There was a brook pushing its way though the undergrowth and across boulders, soft froth creating under such small waterfalls.

The hare quickly crossed the distance that parted it from the scream. One more time it lifted its head to check the forest before it dared to bend down and drink.

It never knew of the dagger that ended its life. It only felt a pinch of pain before its consciousness faded out.

Loki came out from behind the tree he used for cover, closely followed by Thor. He picked up the hare, making sure it's dead and not suffering any more than it has to.

"Nice kill," complimented Thor.

"Thanks," murmured Loki, already busy with skinning the animal. He sat down on one of the stones that lay on the edge of the stream and after a moment Thor did the same.

The older brother didn't like sitting idly by while his sibling did all the work. He noticed a bush growing a few feet away and before Loki was done he collected a handful of purple berries that tasted similarly to currants.

When he returned, offering the fruit, Loki was holding a golden plate in his hands with slices of roasted meat upon it, looking almost as if he had just stolen it from the royal palace kitchens. Thor wasn't surprised by the sight, because he had already witnessed it many times, but it was still something to behold.

"Things like this really make me appreciate your magic," he said openly.

Loki smiled confidently and took a few of the berries from Thor's offering palm.

He never used his magic to cook anything. It was all just an illusion. In reality, they were eating raw meat with their bare hands, but Loki made it seem as if the meat had been cooked purely for their enjoyment of the meal. He even went into such details as smell and taste.

Thor personally thought that sometimes the taste Loki created with illusion was better than of the actual food that he was served during feasts. Maybe it was because Loki knew what he prefers after dozens of similar meals they shared. It was normal for Loki to pay attention to details, but Thor was still pleased to know that Loki bothers to remember trivia about him personally.

A golden goblet appeared out of tin air in Loki's hand accompanied by a spark of green light. Another illusion. It was very skillfully crafted and garnished with small green gemstones.

Loki used the goblet to draw water from the brook. As soon as it was filled, the color of the water turned to dark red.

"Wine?" he offered calmly.

Even despite what he just witnessed, Thor's senses where dimmed with the sweet odor of the liquor and his reaction was purely instinctive: "You shouldn't drink. If someone attacks us, you need to be ready for battle."

Loki clicked his tongue in a disapproving manner. "You literally _just_ saw me cast this illusion on plain water. It _isn't_ wine. It will _not _have the slightest effect on me."

And of course Thor knew that. It was just hard for him to indefinitely remind himself that everything he saw wasn't the way he saw it. He offered a sheepish smile in response to the defiant glare Loki was giving him over the edge of the goblet.

As soon as they were done eating, the golden plate was gone, leaving only bones behind. Loki's cup melted into tiny sparks in his hand when he had drunk the last drop of the wine.

"Don't forget to wash your hands," sang-song Loki, when Thor got on his feat without bending down to the stream first.

Thor rolled his eyes, but obliged anyway. "You always remind me."

"Only because you always forget."

Thor tended to ignore the fact that under the clean and shiny illusions he had held bare meat in his hands. Loki was sometimes confused about how Thor's mind worked, since he seemed to be aware of one thing but at the same time completely oblivious of another.

"You are like mother," muttered Thor in a moment of boyish stubbornness.

"Now that's just hurtful. Why would you ruin my reputation of a fearless warrior with such an insult?"

Thor snorted and Loki's fake smile didn't waver, hiding the sinking feeling that hung to his heart. He was once again reminded of his own weakness and, worse yet, that Thor saw this weakness.

If Thor was aware of Loki's thoughts at that moment, he would be confused about how Loki's mind worked, since he seemed to be aware of one thing but at the same time completely oblivious of another.

But Thor couldn't read minds and never noticed the self-loathing the simple tease brought with it. They both washed their hands in the stream and then they continued on their way, the sun shining how above them in the sky.

* * *

There was a whiz.

Loki's hand shot up and caught an arrow a second before it bore into his neck.

Then Mjölnir shattered the skull of the archer.

There were suddenly a dozen of them, coming from the shadows, jumping down from trees. They were about a head shorter than the gods, pale-skinned and rough-haired. Their clothes were worn out and filled with holes, in some places sewn or patched. There was something fierce in their deep set eyes, making them look savage and wild.

Loki lifted Sannindi and parried a blow from a sword. Their weapons were just as unkept as their general appearance, rusty and unclean. As he swirled, dancing away from another strike and managing at the same time to return the attack, he noticed that some of them don't even have a weapon.

One of them was holding a boulder above his head. He had obviously every intention to throw it at somebody's head. But Thor was faster. One quick, hard blow to stun an attacking warrior, who bravely parried it with his sword and was thus given a horrible pain in his arms and then he threw his hammer. Mjölnir shattered the stone in the hands of the astonished attacker and pieces of it rained down on his head. Then the hammer returned just in time to parry a blow from a different attacker, one with a dagger.

Loki once again jumped away from the sword that was unwisely targeted at his chest. It was obvious that these people weren't trained for fighting. One of them bended down to the dead body of the archer and took his bow, without even looking at the corpse. Due to the incompetence of his opponents Loki had enough time to throw one of his knives in his general direction. The knife cut through the wet wood of the bow, destroying it. At least now he didn't have to worry about having another arrow shot at him.

Some only held sharpened wooden sticks in their hands. As soon as Mjölnir broke them, they threw away the remainder of their weapons and ran, making strange angry hissing noises. They really acted more like animals then human beings. Only the ones with actual weapons, swords, axes and daggers stood their ground, but their blows weren't hard to cover.

"You should be ashamed of yourselves, is that all you can do?" taunted Thor. They didn't respond, only made more of the hissing noises. Another one managed to throw a stone and Thor had to strike it in midair to prevent it from hitting him.

An axe sliced through the air where Loki stood just a second ago. He teleported right behind the warrior and Sannindi neatly cut his throat before he could even gasp in shock. Droplets of blood flew from the blade, as it turned to parry another blow and then quickly breached enemy defense and sliced through his clothes, leaving a red scar on his chest.

Loki noticed that he can't feel his arm, when another blow wasn't as elegant as it was meant to be. Being tired from battle was normal, but it should never happen this soon and in such a way. He shot a quick glance at his hand, just to see if he can guess what's wrong without ever ceasing to move, as movement was what kept him alive and unharmed.

The sight of blue skin made his heart skip a beat.

_No! Why? Where did it come from?!_

He didn't understand. Why was he changing back into that hideous form? He didn't feel cold; it was well above freezing here. No one had touched him. What could have caused it?

Shock and fear occupying his mind, there was hardly any control to his movements anymore. A dagger moved past his defense, his own weapon unable to stop it and it opened a cut on his arm before he could avoid it. Blue blood poured from the wound and Loki felt lightheaded at the sight of it, almost forgetting to lift Sannindi to parry the next attack.

One trait Thor had to acknowledge as admirable was the endurance of the wild fighters. It seemed that no matter how many times he ruined their weapons or cast them aside with his blows, they would always eventually just get up and return to the fight anyway. Even the ones who ran before turned out to have come back with more stones and sticks, despite how useless those proved so far.

For a moment, he considered striking Mjölnir against the ground to knock them down and slow them a little, but he remembered that Loki is fighting near-by and he didn't exactly control the range of the shockwave he created. He swirled, his hammer easily getting though every defense they tried to set up. And then, as he turned to hit one that tried to sneak behind his back, he noticed something.

There was one who didn't join the fight. He was standing at the edge of the forest, inactive. It would seem that he was only watching the fight. It was his clothes that gave away what he was doing there. His long robe was easily recognizable, as it clearly was the best piece of clothing the wildlings possessed. Runes that were sewn on it with golden thread betrayed the character of their wielder.

Thor knew only a little about magic, mostly just commonly known facts that one could learn only by listening to stories. But he could still recognize a mage when he saw one. Similar robes were used by mages in tales, (though no modern mages used them anymore) and the way he just stood there, watching, gave him away. Thor didn't need to understand how magic worked to know that a mage on opponent's side in battle meant only trouble. As he swirled once again to avoid a blow and deal one of his own, he tracked the mage's gaze and found Loki.

A sword left him with a scar on his cheek before he knocked it away, because the sight made him do a double take. He didn't get a good look at him, his enemies using his split attention to their advantage, but he never saw Loki in what he called his true form before, despite how many times they talked about it, and it was unusual to say the least.

Thor didn't wonder what the cause of Loki's change was. It seemed clear. As long as there was a mage, strange things were bound to happen on the battlefield. He parried one last attack with it and then he threw Mjölnir in the direction of the mage, continuing to fight with kicks and blows of his fists. It was definitely harder to fight without his weapon, but his body was more than ready for it.

The mage noticed his death coming towards him too late. He tried to jump away, but then Mjölnir already hit him and he was sent flying though the air, until he hit a tree and fell to the ground like a rag doll. This event had a huge effect on all the other wildlings. When they realized that the most powerful one of them had been defeated, they turned and ran, picking up any weapons that were still intact lying around, but never returning to fight with them.

They disappeared in the shadows between the trees just like when they had attacked and the forest grew strangely still and quiet, giving an unpleasant feeling that they could be anywhere, merely waiting for a chance to attack again.

Loki was gasping for breath, his head spinning. Before they turned and run, they had managed to give him a few more cuts and scars. He couldn't stop looking at the blood, as it slowly trickled down his arms. He didn't feel any pain. It was as if those parts of his body that turned blue were no longer part of him.

Thor caught Mjölnir as it returned to him, but his eyes never left his younger brother. He noticed that not all parts of his skin are blue. Loki was facing away from him, looking at his own arms as if he saw them for the first time in his life. Thor felt an urgent need to comfort him, because his heart seemed to never have learned its lesson. He moved, shortening the distance between himself and his brother.

"Loki," he said and reached out to touch him.

The soft sound of his own name echoed in his ears, as Loki turned, startled to remember Thor's presence. The second his eyes met Thor's sky blue ones, he felt irrational need to run and hide, so his older brother wouldn't see him. He managed a quick step back, before Thor caught his arm, soaking his fingers in the blue blood, but what should have been a painful touch meant nothing, because Loki didn't even feel it.

"Calm down. Please, Loki, it's okay." His own words rang hollow as he looked upon Loki's face. Due to whatever had caused it, his skin was partly blue, dividing across his face. One of his eyes was red, while the other remained green, but both reflected such terror that matched only the one on the day he discovered the truth.

Then Thor noticed the blood and practical concerns kicked in. "Why aren't your injuries healing?" The scar he himself had received in fight was long gone.

Loki's thoughts were a blur. Had his body at last decided that it's time to stop lying and return to its true form? Why now? And why couldn't he feel anything? Was he truly turning into a heartless, soulless monster?

He wanted to cry and for once he didn't even have the strength to hate himself for it. He didn't want Thor to see him this way.

"Let me go," he said. Or more like _whined_, his voice strained and broken.

Thor didn't like holding Loki against his will but he was scared that if he obliges, Loki will run away or worse, teleport from him and he will never find him again in this wilderness. It seemed like an irrational fear, only the way Loki tried to move away from him justified it. He needed to know that Loki is calm first and since there seemed to be no other way, he decided to keep talking.

"It's going to be fine. We are going to figure this out. It's the mage who did this, somehow, isn't it? I'm sure you can break his spells no matter what they do to you. Please, stop avoiding my eyes, Loki."

_A mage_. Loki felt as if he'd been slapped. He allowed his nerves to drain all sanity from him, leaving him as a weeping child at the hated sight of his own monstrosity, when there was a perfectly clear reason for all of it mere inches away. All he had to do was think clearly, but he panicked. Was there nothing he could do without acting like a pitiful maiden?!

He didn't stop avoiding Thor's eyes, as he relaxed his stance. He believed he was going to choke on his shame as he closed his eyes and felt for his own energy, finding it in messy knots just like with the tree they found in the morning. It was so obvious now, why was he so scared before?

Thor noticed that Loki had relaxed and let his arm go. He wished Loki would look at him and explain what was happening. Did his words actually work or did Loki calm down from a different reason? He didn't flatter himself that he could calm Loki down with mere words, seeing that it had never worked before.

"Is there anything I can do, Loki? I want to help."

As he brushed Loki's shoulder, his younger brother turned away completely.

"Don't look at me," he sneered, his voice stronger now. His fears hadn't gone completely. He knew what had caused it, but that didn't change the fact that he was ugly to behold and he didn't want Thor to see him.

The disruptive spell blocked his magic from flowing through his body. Because his usual appearance was a work of illusion, when he lost magic his body gained back its real look. The parts of his body that were cut away from his power were numb and if he wouldn't renew the energy flow in time, they would die. As he slowly worked through the separated streams of energy, pushing though them with all the power he had left to clear the way, he opened his eyes and watched as his skin changed back.

It was morbidly fascinating. Blue skin covered with blue blood turned to pale skin with red blood shining brightly against it. He never realized that his blood is blue. He supposed he knew that Frost Giants have blue blood, though he never thought about it. What really bothered him was the strange, twisted realization that his curse goes deeper than skin. That truly everything about him, including the very blood he bleeds, is a lie.

His injuries started healing once he returned to his usual form. It wasn't because he was Aesir but because of his magic. He supposed he knew that too, long time ago when he had weaved a spell around himself to constantly heal his body, when he saw how easily Thor and everyone else around him heal. He didn't really remember it, for it was more than a thousand years ago, but he knew it was so, because he vaguely felt the spell when he focused on it.

Thor's patience was at its end. He was glad to see that Loki returned to his normal appearance and his wounds have healed, but he was just about done with waiting for answers.

"Stop ignoring me, Loki."

Finally Loki lifted his eyes to look at him, both of them green and brilliant, his skin pale and pure. He hesitated for a moment, but then a smile spread across his face and he started talking, the surreal cheerfulness of his voice far removed from the previous show of emotion.

"Right, you probably want to know who it was and why they attacked us. Do you remember our history lessons?"

Thor shook his head in confusion, only concern showing on his face. He didn't really want to know about any of that. All he cared about what whether Loki was alright.

"Not that I expected you to. These men were once Vanir mages. Let just say that they were interested in those kinds of magic that didn't help preserve harmony and friendship. Odin decided they were far too dangerous and should no longer be supported. They were asked to give up their knowledge, but they refused."

"Loki-"

"Interestingly enough, Frey, one of their biggest supporters, turned tail once Odin decided to stick his fingers in the matter and soon he was begging the Allfather to help him drive the darkness-spreading warlocks from his kingdom. That's not what we were taught, by the way; it's the truth. And so it was done, leaving them here in the wilds."

"Can I-"

"But despite how much he claimed to dislike their magic, Odin actually kept every study that was ever written on it. That's how I know about it. I imagine that as generations passed, the knowledge became a privilege known only by few of them while the others specified on survival. They attacked us, because we have clothes and weapons. Those must be very scarce in the wilds."

"Stop talking!"

Loki fell silent, offence clear on his face. But Thor didn't care, not as long as he knew that it wasn't real. Loki was trying to change the subject and make him forget any of what had occurred and that only strengthened Thor's notion to be concerned about it.

"What did the mage do to you, exactly? Why did you change?"

It was strange, Loki thought. Usually this approach would work with Thor and he would slowly let himself be lulled by the stream of words, until he forgot anything Loki needed him to forget. The fact that he actually endured this time could only mean that he truly cared. Loki allowed himself to be touched by that.

"He used the disruptive spell on me. He took my magic." The fake cheerfulness was gone, leaving his voice cool and even.

"Wait, didn't you say part of the tree died after this kind of spell was used on it?" There was genuine worry in Thor's eyes and Loki simply couldn't force himself to be insulted by it, despite how much he hated being babied.

"That would only happen if I didn't stop the spell and fix the damage it had done. I'm fine now."

"But you weren't before..." Thor's voice softened. "You were scared."

"I-" There was so much he could say. He could feign offence and make Thor apologize for such a claim despite how childish such a reaction seemed. He could try to change the topic again or find a way to turn it all into a joke. But there have already been enough lies about his true appearance. "I didn't want you to see me."

It was as simple as that. Believing he turned into his true form without any reason was one thing, but believing he turned into his true form without any reason in front of Thor's very eyes was something completely different.

"Why would you think it would change anything?" asked Thor, with a kind, caring smile.

To Loki, the smile was only an insult to the injury.

"Because I'm a _Frost Giant_, maybe?" His voice was biting and cold.

"But that doesn't-"

"Liar!" Loki screamed.

Thor stared at him, taken aback.

"Don't you dare say that it doesn't mean anything! You hate Frost Giants. _I _hate Frost Giants! How can you just go and deny it? And _why _would you? What changed?!"

Thor moved suddenly and Loki didn't even have time to gasp before Thor pulled him in, so close he was almost hugging him, but far enough so they could still see each others faces.

"Oh, Loki. I thought I am your guardian but it seems I've done a terrible job if you are so scared of me that you won't even let me look at you. Did you think I would attack you at first sight because I wouldn't be able to distinguish you from my enemy?"

Loki couldn't breathe. He couldn't begin to understand the feelings that filled him at the thought of how close to each other they were and that Thor just dubbed himself his guardian, the thing Loki always wished him to be but was much too scared to ask for.

"I was scared that once you see the truth, you will see through the lie thenceforth." He explained meekly.

"What lie? What do you mean?"

"Once you've seen what I really look like, you wouldn't believe the illusion I put on day after day. You would always see me as a blue-skinned red-eyed monster, even if I changed to look like I do now. If you never saw me, then I could still hope that despite everything that was said, you don't see me that way..." And then as an after-thought, he added: "You are so gullible when it comes to illusions, after all."

Thor snorted and smiled. "Maybe I am. It doesn't matter to me if I ever saw your true form. I will always see you like this." His thump gently stroked Loki's pale cheek. "My little brother."

Loki smiled back, for a short while simply enjoying the closeness. There was an ocean of calm and care in those blue eyes that he yearned to drown in. He wasn't sure why, but he found himself talking.

"For a moment there I thought I had lost control. I thought the monster was taking over me and there was nothing I could do about it. How do you- How do _we _know it will never happen?"

The spark of fear in Thor's eyes was anything but encouraging. He pulled Loki closer, actually hugging him this time, breaking eye contact. Loki closed his eyes and rested his head on Thor's shoulder.

"It won't happen," the older brother said simply.

"You are scared," murmured Loki, not believing his own words. Thor wasn't scared of anything. If not because he was strong, then definitely because he was foolish and stubborn.

"I wanted to protect you." Thor doubted there was ever any other reason for his entire existence. "But I failed. I watched you cry as you bled from wounds I couldn't heal. I couldn't as much as touch you. It was on that day that I realized there are things I can't protect you from. I doubt the fear will ever go away."

Whatever Loki was expecting, this wasn't it. He never realized that he might not have been the only one to suffer on that day. He didn't know how to respond.

"But it won't happen," repeated Thor stubbornly and squeezed him lightly. "There is nothing in you that would make you like them. You may look like them, underneath, but your mind is different. If nothing else, there is no Frost Giant as smart as you."

Loki smirked to himself. "And witty. Don't forget witty."

"And imprudent."

"And cunning."

"And attractive."

"Whoa there, keep it down or I might actually blush!" Loki gave a startled laugh and pulled back to look at Thor's face. He tried to ignore his racing heart though it did him little good. He told himself that Thor was only joking. He couldn't have possibly meant that...

Thor laughed too. He had no idea why he had decided to say it, aside from the fact that it felt right. Loki would take it as a joke anyway.

Loki always knew that he needed Thor to protect him. And Thor wanted the same thing. If this was the case, there seemed to be almost no reason to keep denying it to both of them. _Almost_.

But if he stopped denying, he would be forced to admit that he can never be safe on his own. That he was nothing. He would only be part of Thor. His heart told him that he wanted that. His mind screamed in refusal.

"Anyway, what I meant to say was that no matter what will happen I will always be there for you," said Thor, almost bashfully.

It was about time Loki took a leap of faith.

"I believe you," he whispered.

Thor's heart melted at the simple words. It was an offer of trust. He almost lost hope that he will ever receive it from Loki. He could only pray to never loose it. But right now, he felt whole. His world was resting in his arms.

Loki's eyes were warm and kind and Thor nearly lost himself in them. As he held him like this, he became aware of just how delicate and beautiful Loki is. All sensible thoughts were gone. Something inside told him what to do and he slowly leaned forward; gently, so he wouldn't ruin the perfection.

Loki gave a quiet gasp and moved away. He couldn't listen to his raging feelings, he needed to think.

"Maybe we should move on. We are wasting daylight," he said.

Thor was reluctant to listen to him, right up to the moment until the knowledge of what nearly happened caught up to him. Loki was his _brother._ Where were these feelings coming from?

He broke the embrace, leaving the moment behind.

* * *

**Note: So close... You probably hate me now xD**


	4. Gaining Ground

**Note: I assume you all guessed that English is my second language by now. (If you didn't, my ego will be very pleased to hear indeed.) Feel free to point out any mistakes, I'm always happy to improve :)**

* * *

**Gaining Ground**

There was a lot to think about.

For one thing, Loki was more than aware of being attractive and proceeded to use it in his advantage whenever he could; only that was with people he never met before. Hearing it from Thor was different.

He loved Thor, admired and adored him. He had for his whole life. But he used to believe it was simply brotherly. There were little moments, when he doubted; sudden strikes of clarity when he yearned for more. But those were frail and passed quickly, forgotten or suppressed as illogical. Needing Thor and wanting him were two separate things, but he found himself crossing the line. Maybe it was the way Thor carried himself, the intoxicating confidence and strength. Maybe it was the way he smiled, or the way he held Loki. It all made Loki want to get lost in him with no return.

His thoughts ran to Odin and Frigga. What would they think if they found out that their sons see each other in a way that siblings shouldn't? He wasn't sure about Frigga, but Odin wouldn't like it. It would most certainly ruin all of his plans.

Maybe that was another reason why Loki was so tempted to do it.

On the other hand, crossing Odin meant problems. He had to be ready for that, yet here he stood, still undecided how to entirely free himself from Odin's grasp. Odin was behind their presence here. Loki had no right to feel defiant if he was still acting as a puppet.

He needed to be sure. He couldn't just give himself up to senseless lust and create more problems with it than he could ever solve. Was there a way to figure out if the trouble would be worth it? He didn't know.

Lust felt different, though, he knew as much. This was something deeper. This was the two of them destined to be everything to each other. He doubted there was a word for that.

* * *

Thor was trying to find the source of the warm feeling that seized his chest. His eyes found Loki. He was magnificent. For a while Thor simply watched him as they walked. Then Loki noticed him staring, turned to him and smiled. It wasn't a smirk or a wicked grin. It was a gentle, almost shy smile.

And Thor realized he loved it. The gentleness and elegance. The sweetness and kindness. He never saw it in Loki before, because Loki wouldn't let it show, but it resurfaced when he was hurt and couldn't hide anymore. His icy mask slipped and Thor realized he fell in love with what he found underneath. A vulnerable soul.

Maybe it wasn't that strange, when he thought about it. He was raised as a warrior and every warrior was meant to protect the weak and save the damsel in distress.

He had to smirk to himself. Was he really thinking about Loki as a damsel now?

Then his smirk froze. He remembered that some of the servants mocked Loki by calling him "Lady Loki" behind his back and how Loki hated it. Thor didn't even know who and why came up with it, but the servants always seemed to have a lot to say about Loki. He never really got it before. It was like calling Hogun cheerful – it made no sense. Now though, as he looked at Loki, he realized that there might have been more to it. Loki actually_ was_ very feminine, with his attention to detail, the way he preferred to tread carefully during their adventures and his passive way of handling combat. Plus, warriors didn't cry – or so everyone in Asgard seemed to think. That all considered, Loki obviously always took it for what it was made into: an insult.

And as this understanding hit him, it all seemed to fell together. He loved this part of Loki, he was sure of that now. And he had every intention of showing Loki that there was never any need of being insulted by it. This soft and vulnerable part of him deserved appreciation and Thor's heart soared at the prospect that he will be the one to provide it.

That was, of course, if Loki was going to let him. It was the same story over and over again. All Thor ever wanted was to help, but Loki shut him out and in the end made him feel like he's doing something against his younger brother's will. And he moved away before when Thor almost kissed him. Maybe he didn't even feel the same way? They were still brothers after all, even though Thor found himself hoping for more.

Determination filled him. It didn't matter whether Loki yearned for him the way he did for Loki. He was still going to do everything for him, like he was always ready to. Any fears of failure were just dark shadows at the back of his mind. Thor wasn't the one to let doubts slow him down.

* * *

They walked for a few more hours. The sun was shining majestically up on the sky, which was clear and pure like a blue-grey ocean. The two planets levitated peacefully in the cyan void.

Thor studied the map, but didn't say anything and Loki didn't ask. There was light shimmering though the trees ahead and eventually the forest ended, leaving them at the beginning of a meadow. It was filled with flowers. Far ahead of them the forest returned, circling the whole place. And as the sky above them cleared, they could see high mountains in the distance, alit with the sun from one side and drowning in shadow on the other.

"The temple is somewhere in those mountains," said Thor at last, with one last glance at the map. It was still going to be a few days before they get there.

"It's going to be quite a walk."

"Well, if it starts feeling too long I can always just fly and carry you." Thor's eyes sparkled as he said it.

"You wouldn't dare," laughed Loki, without really thinking about it.

Thor's face immediately fell. Of course he wouldn't accept. Being handled gently was an insult to Loki. Thor wasn't sure how to cross this rift.

Loki noticed the pitiful look in Thor's eyes and realized that he slipped back into the old act of independence. If he was going to live with the knowledge that he's weak and Thor is his guardian, then he should just as well get used to being carried like a lady. It was happening. He was going to have to admit that he was nothing without Thor.

He wasn't ready. "I can walk just fine on my own," he snarled.

"I didn't mean to offend you," said Thor quickly. "It was just an idea. Nothing degrading about it."

"Of course," answered Loki icily. It could hardly be degrading when Thor already knew that Loki was weak and accepted it as a fact. Only a liar was insulted by reality.

They walked buried up to their waists in grass. The meadow seemed to be glowing with orange light in the rays of the sun. The flowers had their blossoms attentively turned towards it.

Thor was desperately searching for a way to change the topic and noticed one particular flower with dark blue petals. He plucked one blossom and held it to the side of his face (because it wouldn't hold still in his hair), turning to Loki.

"Remember Vanne? With her flowers?"

Loki smirked when he recalled her, though it was more of a bittersweet memory, considering all his recent thoughts. Vanne was a diplomatic envoy of the Light Elves of Alfheim. A very beautiful and charming young lady, with dark blue eyes and long bronze hair that always had a flower in it. A few decades ago she visited Asgard, despite it already being in an alliance with the elves for a few centuries with no need of any new diplomatic contact. She claimed she hoped to come to know better their allies, because she had always admired Asgardian culture.

"It wasn't the flowers what was memorable about her," he said.

What she really came to do was improve Alfheim's social standing in the Nine Realms. And her plan on doing that consisted of seducing the future King.

"Oh, you weren't there when she gave me a lecture about all the flowers in Alfheim. I'd never believe someone could have so much to say about plants."

Loki laughed. He didn't know about that and it surprised him. At the time, Vanne seemed to be the perfect companion. She was merry and kind, excited by almost anything and making the simplest things appear interesting. And Thor definitely didn't seem to mind her company.

"She was everywhere," continued Thor in amused tone. "I couldn't even move without stumbling over her."

At first she just seemed friendly, but Loki soon enough figured out what her real intention was. She made sure to never send him away as long as it was obvious that Thor liked him present, but whenever she could drag Thor out to a place where they would be alone, she did.

"And yet she always had a perfect excuse to be exactly where she was," said Loki.

Perhaps he wasn't simply annoyed back then as he stubbornly kept telling himself. Maybe what he did was selfish. But she was forcing her way to places she had no right to.

Then again, who ever said that _he_ had the right?

"Yeah, I would tell her to let me focus on my battle training and the next moment, she would be there again, cheering me on," agreed Thor. When question why she didn't leave as she was told, she would promptly claim that there will never be calm in battle to let Thor focus, so a little distraction adds to the efficiency of the training.

"And then she would trip over her own feet and nearly fall on your sword," added Loki innocently.

Loki was sure he never pulled as many pranks on a single person; not that he was counting. Vanne's life was turned into madness. Wherever she went, things went wrong. And no matter how many quizzical looks Thor gave her, she always acted as a true lady, hiding her feelings and smiling pleasantly. She was brave and there seemed to be no way she would ever give up her goal over simple accidents.

"Yeah, with things like that, it's almost weird we didn't notice anything wrong with her sooner."

Eventually Loki lost his patience with her. He created a complex illusion and let her believe that Thor finally warmed up to her. She found herself embracing and kissing a column in the feasting chamber which she believed to be her future husband. After that she was rather crudely sent back to Alfheim. Everyone agreed that she was mad and for the next few years the relationship between Asgard and Alfheim suffered, as both sides were insulted by the envoy's behavior.

"You should be more careful about who you spend your time with," half-joked Loki.

That was the last time Loki was allowed to stay in Asgard whenever diplomats from different realms were present. Not that anyone ever said it out loud. He and Thor simply always found themselves on a convenient adventure whenever there was an important meeting.

Thor smiled at him. "Oh, I think I'm good. I'm with _you_."

The self-loathing part of Loki insisted that he doesn't make for excellent company either, but it was silenced by the warm feeling the words gave him. The frustration that made him prank Vanne in the first place told him that this is the correct answer Thor was meant to give all along.

He smiled back gratefully, hiding any other feelings.

Thor threw the flower away, grinning. "Do you think she's still somewhere out there making out with columns?"

"Oh, by now she's done with making out. She probably crowned the column and calls herself a Queen."

"The worst part it, it sounds pretty plausible," said Thor with a crooked smile. "If I'm going to be King, the only person I want by my side is you."

Such sincerity made lying hard. Loki tried to come up with something to say, but he couldn't lull the ache somewhere in his chest. Maybe he should finally share at least a shred of the truth.

"But I wouldn't be there," he said, staring into distance. "That's not how it was planned."

"What?" Thor's gaze swiftly turned serious, his expression somewhere between confusion, worry and fear. His thoughts scattered like frightened birds. Why wouldn't Loki be with him? Did he not _want_ to? What plans was he talking about? Who and when made them?

And even before Loki answered, Thor knew it had something to do with _that _day.

"I would be King of our dying enemies. Odin kindly told me so, before denying it and expressing his _love_ for me," the last words were spoken with clear disgust.

On that day, Thor listened behind the door to the vault chamber, which he happened on by a mere chance. He was curious about what were Odin and Loki talking about, but soon his curiosity was rightfully punished. He was shocked to hear Odin describe what happened after the battle in Jotunheim. His heart breaking, he listened on as Loki demanded a purpose and Odin admitted that he wished to bring peace to the realms. Odin tried to reassure Loki that he's still his son, but when Loki refused to accept it... There's been a lot of shouting about arrogance and trickery.

Loki ran out of the vault in tears. When he realized Thor had every intention of following him and attempting to calm him down, he teleported away. Thor spent rest of the day searching for him and when he finally found him, Loki simply ignored him, as if he wasn't there. Thor tried to talk to him, touch him, hold him, but Loki was like a statue. The tears that ran down his face and wouldn't stop were the only thing moving, his eyes empty and his expression cold. Nobody and nothing could take away his misery.

"I... guess I never understood that part. Father said that you would be King?"

Loki gave him a thoughtful look. "Let me put it this way. Odin told me that he found me as a baby all alone and abandoned. He took pity on me and decided to take me as his own. And _then_ he told me that I'm Laufey's son." He paused. "See the contradiction?"

Thor shook his head.

"It's that when you find an abandoned baby you don't know the name of its father unless you really care and decide to go into all the trouble of finding out. If I was thrown out to die, do you think they would write me down in the chronicles of the royal blood line? No, of course not. They would try to keep quiet about me. That means it wasn't as easy as reading a book for Odin to know. _How_ does he know then?"

It seemed that nothing could stop Loki from thinking over details. If this were about anything else, Thor would be impressed.

"It opens up the possibility that he lied about how he found me too, you know. Maybe he stole me right from my mother's breast, asking her about my father before killing her. Maybe he searched for me, kidnapped me-"

Thor felt he needed to object. This was their – or his – father, after all. Loki couldn't actually believe that, could he? He was only saying things like this, because he was still angry at Odin.

"Why would he do that?" he demanded.

"Because he needed a blood heir to the Jotun throne," answered Loki readily.

It would be short-sighted to not expect Loki to have an answer. Thor didn't lose a beat in questioning it. "What good would that do him? He still raised you as his own."

Loki shot him a look. "Do you know how Frost Giants pass down the crown?"

Thor was at a loss. The mockery in Loki's eyes told him that this was something he should know, so it was probably some part of the lessons they received as children, but he couldn't recall ever hearing about it.

"As long as there is at least one royal heir alive, they will follow him as their King," explained Loki. "The thing we were taught, but which you obviously forgot, is that they can feel their own blood, even under illusions. They also recognize the blood line, in this case the royal one. And their codex makes them perfectly obedient to their ruler."

"Wait, doesn't that mean that they should have recognized you when we went to Jotunheim?" asked Thor, slightly startled at the prospect.

"They did."

"But they fought you like the rest of us..." Thor's imagination came up with a picture of all the Frost Giants bowling respectfully at the sight of his younger brother.

"I wasn't their King at the time. Members of the royal family are nothing if they aren't the King. It would be impossible for them to cast me out if it was any different."

Thor stayed silent for a while. He didn't like the picture Loki was painting for him with each word.

The silence was tearing at Loki's nerves though he did his best to hide it. He dreaded this moment for so long. He finally gathered the courage to ask Thor to choose between him and the Allfather. He had no idea what he would do if Thor rejected him. He quickly decided to fill the gap with more words.

"Odin used to tell us that we were both born to be kings. It seemed to me that he's just trying to cheer me up, because it was obvious that you were the heir of Asgard. But of all things, it seems he was telling the truth about that. I would be his puppet, his hand to control the Frost Giants with. I would trust him and respect him, because he would raise me to be meek and obedient. When one has as much time as Odin has, he finds out he can shape the universe around him."

"Father said that any plans he had for you don't matter anymore, didn't he? He wouldn't do it," said Thor. He didn't want to think about this. He hated picking sides between two members of his family. Even after everything Loki said, he couldn't believe that his father would ever be like that.

"I don't see why not. He wouldn't let the whole point of my existence pass because of parental affection. I imagine his original plan was that he would find an easy way to get rid of all the trueborn sons of Laufey and get me to Jotunheim. He probably wouldn't even talk to me about it and he definitely wouldn't let me know that it's my natural state. I would put on an illusion and think that it worked, while in reality they would see me for who I truly was, but either way I would become their King."

Thor was frowning, staring blindly ahead as he walked.

"I can't say I know exactly what he was thinking, but on the day when I discovered the truth, I think he changed his plans," continued Loki. "Maybe he realized that I'm not as obedient as he wished me to be. He denied his plan and claimed he loved me so I would wish to stay in the dark he was keeping me in." Loki hesitated for a moment, but he already confessed so much, that one little thing couldn't possibly change anything. "But that wasn't going to work, so... I don't know what his plans are now. I don't believe he _wouldn't_ use me in some way. I don't _want _to be the King of Frost Giants, but from his point of view, my existence would be _wasted_ anywhere else. So, in a way, I'm scared of him."

Thor looked up at the last words, catching Loki's gaze. For that one single moment it seemed clear, as his protectiveness silenced all other emotions. It didn't matter if Thor himself believed it. This whole new context to what exactly Loki discovered on that day made it ever more terrifying; even _if_ it were all delusions Loki tortured himself with.

"You don't have to be. I'll protect you," he said comfortingly. He doubted father would ever do anything of what Loki claimed, but that wasn't a reason to not try and make Loki feel better.

Loki's sad smile told him that he doesn't believe those words.

Loki didn't even know what he should expect from Odin, so how could any vow of protection change anything? Was Odin going to make him perfectly obedient and then sit him upon the hated throne? If so, how was he going to do it? Would there be a way of finding out about it? Or would Loki simply one day feel the need to crown himself a lost King and do whatever it was the whisper in his ear said? And then, there was also the possibility that Odin will eventually realize that all his plans were in vain, because there wasn't a way of forcing Loki to do what he wanted from him. You couldn't force someone on a throne and then expect them to rule in your favor. That would make him useless and somehow Loki had the feeling that it didn't mean Odin would let him live his life as he pleased, enjoying the high status the adoption gave him without giving anything back. And aside from all that, he had to consider that there could always be others aside from Odin, who would see his blood as useful. What would he do if Frigga begged him on her knees to become the King of Frost Giants and bring peace to the realms?

"You would have to destroy Jotunheim to do that," he answered, his voice hollow. Was there such a thing as a right answer at this point? Was there a happy ending if he whole-heartedly despised the one thing he was ever meant to be? To be trapped in Jotunheim while Thor ruled alone in Asgard, when everything they ever wanted was to stay together?

Thor sighed, looking away. He believed Odin, almost just as much as Loki suspected him, so there really seemed to be no point in further arguing. Besides, he really hated seeing Loki so drained and depressed. There's been enough thinking for one day. He decided he will make Loki smile instead.

"There's actually one thing that I always wondered about Frost Giants," he said at length and waited for his younger brother to take the bait.

Loki hesitated before answering. The way Thor spoke suggested a joke and he wasn't sure if he was in mood for those. But he reluctantly had to admit that there would be no use in pushing the matter. If Thor wasn't persuaded yet, Loki could try again later. Or, if he was never persuaded, he would give up; losing the only ally he ever hoped to have. Continuing the argument would only serve to lose him right here and now.

"What is that?"

Thor's eyes shone with mischief. "Do you think they are ticklish?"

Loki didn't even have time to process the question, before Thor jumped towards him and tickled his exposed neck. Loki gave a startled squeal of laugher. His rational mind immediately told him to feel ashamed and he cut it short as soon as he could. But Thor wasn't going to give him a chance to catch his breath. His fingers moved to Loki's armpits, brushing him slightly and, like a miracle, creating a helpless smile on his face. All sensible thoughts were moved aside as Loki couldn't hold back the laugher. He nearly collapsed in Thor's arms, as his body instinctively squirmed to get away from the touch.

When Thor finally let him go, he stumbled a few steps back and gasped for air. Thor watched him with a triumphant smile on his face.

Loki returned the smile, playful, careless joy taking over him. Thor always knew how to raise his spirits. Getting away from all the problems in Asgard was his primary reason for actually being here, after all. There will be enough time for glooming later. Right now, he could be happy.

"This means war!" he called, before launching himself onto his older brother. Thor braced himself to catch him, but the figure he believed to be his brother shattered when he touched it. Loki appeared behind him, his fingers slipping under Thor's arms and returning the tickling. Thor's composure broke and he didn't hold back the laughter, the meadow echoing with his voice.

Thor easily escaped his grasp because Loki had no means of holding him. He stopped a few steps away and turned back to look at him. His eyes shining, never ceasing to smile, he didn't even need to speak for Loki to understand the silent challenge.

Loki shook his head over such childish behavior, but then gave chase nonetheless.

They ran over the meadow, making their way through the fresh green grass that glittered like gold and the colorful flowers were like jewels scattered among it. The sky was pink and orange now, as the sun closed to the west side. The world around them was shining and beautiful and they felt merry and free.

Thor was naturally faster than Loki, his body athletic and strong. Loki didn't bother to _actually_ try and catch him. After a short while, he reached for his magic and, with the next step he took, jumped though a wormhole in space.

He teleported right in front of Thor, who didn't have enough time to slow down. They crashed into each other and fell into the grass. They were both laughing even as they gasped for air. Thor ended up at the top of Loki. For a moment his thoughts raced in the wrong direction, before he stopped them. Loki didn't feel the same way, he reminded himself, and pushed himself off of his younger brother. They stayed lying next to each other in the soft grass.

"Got you," Loki said when he could finally speak. Silly as it was, he couldn't wipe a smile off his face.

"I should have expected you would teleport, you cheater," said Thor, his warm expression indication he didn't mean it as an offence.

"Teleportation isn't cheating. You could teleport too, if you wanted," argued Loki.

"I don't know how."

"That's your problem. But you still _could_, because it's totally allowed." Loki's winning grin made Thor laugh again.

Then Loki remembered something, the grin still in place. "I don't think Frost Giants are ticklish, but you can always try. The next time we're in Jotunheim, you should test it."

"That's an ingenious battle strategy."

"Clearly, your air-headedness is a contagious disease."

"You mean my incredibly brilliant mind."

They were grinning at each other, when Thor suddenly hissed in pain and lifted a hand to touch the right side of his neck. Loki watched him curiously.

Thor sat up and Loki followed suit. There wouldn't be any point in asking what was going on, because he doubted it could be anything serious.

Then Thor finally withdrew his hand away from his neck. He was holding a small silvery blue snake between his fingers. It was short and slim and trying with all its might to twist free. Two needle-sharp teeth could be seen in its opened mouth, as it hissed angrily.

Loki hated when he drew a complete blank on knowledge like an inattentive student. (Though this wasn't really about him not paying attention during his lessons but the lack of literature on the subject.) He knew for a fact that he didn't know anything about this species of snake and it immediately made him feel unsecure.

"Pest," murmured Thor angrily and then simply threw it away. It was so tiny that they lost sight of it before it even landed.

Loki couldn't stop his thoughts from running in the obvious direction. Was the snake poisonous? Could it affect Thor in any way?

Thor's hand returned to his throat. He had a bite mark there, left by the snake's teeth and one drop of blood was leaking from it, but his natural regeneration powers were already working on sealing the wound. Before his finger even touched it, there was nothing but perfect skin once again.

That _looked_ like everything was alright, but Loki stayed cautious. Thor absent-mindedly rubbed the healed skin and turned to him, smiling again. "That kind of hurt. Maybe we should start moving again."

Loki obliged without any complaint. He definitely had no desire of getting bitten and it wouldn't help the situation if Thor got bitten more than once. They had no way of knowing how many snakes could be at one place at the same time, but he knew for sure that they will be safer from them once they leave the grassland.

Then Thor tried to stand up and stumbled, falling back on the ground.

Loki's blood seemed to have halted in his veins.

He tried to lie to himself that it was some sort of harmless side effect of getting bitten. It didn't necessarily have to mean anything serious. But he knew that wasn't the truth. Only poison could have any sort of effect at all, since bites healed immediately. A lesser creature – say an animal – could get the wound infected and suffer dizziness even after getting bitten by a non-venomous snake, but this didn't apply in their case.

Thor looked up. He recognized Loki though the picture was blurry. The world swayed around him, colorful dots filling his vision. "I'm fine," he said, his tongue clumsy and heavy. His head was thumping with strange dull pain that made him want to shut his eyes tightly until it goes away. His thoughts seemed to have fallen asleep, so he wasn't even at first able to make the obvious connection as to what was happening.

Loki didn't waste any time in reaching for his healing magic and using it on Thor. He felt Thor's energy opening up to him and accepting what he was giving, but didn't register it doing anything. Thor's own body considered itself to be completely healthy.

He tried searching Thor's power flows, but poison didn't work like disruptive spell despite every comparison he ever made. There was nothing to fix. He felt like screaming in frustration when he pulled back.

There was nothing he could _do_. He couldn't think of any spell that could help. He was confided to stand uselessly around and watch. Only one thing he knew for sure: either the body would heal itself soon or not at all. More time would only allow the poison to spread further.

"I should have known," he said as he crunched down to be on the same level with sitting Thor. "I would never let us lie in grass if I had known such things live here! But oh, how could I, when you simply _had _to conquer Muspelheim!" His voice was rising uncontrollably. It felt wrong to try and blame Thor for this. His eyes were filling with tears and he hated it so, _so_ much. He was just a crying child, a lost sad little _girl_. Always running, always crying. Not even brave enough to admit that _that_'s what he is. _How_ could _he_ ever save Thor, who was possibly _dying _right in front of him, when he was so _useless _it _hurt_?

Thor wanted to fall asleep. His eyes were closing all on their own. Surely the terrible headache would go away if he just slept for a while. His flickering consciousness didn't allow him much space for pondering, so even though he was aware of Loki's voice, the words made no sense to him.

"You wouldn't _dare_ do this to me!" Loki was shouting in Thor's face and part of him felt horrible for it, but he wanted Thor to acknowledge him, to react, to do _something_ other than sit there, looking like he will collapse any second and loose consciousness if he hadn't already. "You can't leave me! I could never live without you!"

And even as the desperate words crossed his lips, he knew they were true. He always tried to hide it, lied to himself so long and so profoundly, because this wasn't how he wanted it to be. He believed it would limit him, if he acknowledged that he can't live on his own. He would either live with whoever he depended upon or not at all and _such _a thought made him feel weak and he hated it. But now he understood. This wasn't about how he imagined it at all. He was part of Thor and he loved being part of Thor. He could view it as a limitation, being unable to live alone, but he didn't _want _to live alone. It wasn't about being too weak to survive. He simply didn't care for his own life as much as for Thor. If Thor died, there would be no reason for him to live.

He was just Odin's broken toy. If Thor died, perhaps then he should embrace his true form and exile himself to Jotunheim...

And as his thoughts ran to his Jotun blood, he suddenly remembered power that he never studied and never tried before in his life. It lay forgotten under all knowledge and spells he learned consciously, but he realized it must be there.

Thor's breathing was rapid and shallow, as if he was going to choke. Loki's fingers trembled when he reached out and touched Thor's neck in place where he was bitten. There was no time for hesitation. He didn't know if it won't make the situation worse, but there was hardly anything to loose at this point. He had to at least try it.

He summoned his Frost Giant ability to control ice. The illusion he created on his hand immediately wavered as it got damaged by the severe coldness, so his palm turned dark blue. He paid it no heed. He pierced Thor's skin and carefully directed the ice in. Thor screamed in pain. Anything touched by the magic was dying and Loki guided it through his veins, freezing his blood.

Loki extended his perception of magical energy and sensed his way though Thor's circulatory system. Thor's screams were tearing at his ears and heart, but he couldn't let that stop him. He held Thor in place, even as the weakened warrior clumsily tried to move away. He was aware of how Thor's regeneration powers awakened once they registered damage in the body and started replacing the freezing, dying cells with new ones, cleaning the blood in the process. It was working.

Inch by inch Loki destroyed everything in Thor's blood system including the venom and Thor's healing powers fixed everything Thor needed just a second later, following Loki's progress step by step.

When he was done, Loki felt drained as if he just performed the most complex spell in the universe. He sat down in the grass, too tired to stand or crouch any longer and looked at Thor.

His older brother slowly shook his head and then looked up at him with confusion. He looked as if nothing ever happened to him, and the sight made Loki laugh hysterically as relief swept over him and tears ran down his face.

"Are you... alright?" asked Thor reluctantly. His memory was a mess; he didn't know what really happened and what was just a dream. He woke up to a world of pain. When the pain finally burned away, he was left feeling unexpectedly good. And then there was Loki, sitting right in front of him and by any means _not_ alright.

"You're alive," said Loki as if it explained everything. Even with tears on his cheeks and slightly out of breath, he somehow managed to smile mischievously. And then, as if it was the most natural thing in the world, he leaned forward and kissed Thor, in one elegant motion.

Thor's mind drew a complete blank, except for a fleeting thought that he might have died and gone to paradise. Only Valhalla didn't look anything like this. And then, even as his attention focused on Loki's pressing lips, somewhere at the back of his mind Loki's words clicked together with his memories. This was real and he just survived a brush with death.

Loki withdrew, breaking the touch and smiled the soft, almost shy smile that Thor loved.

"Get up," said Loki. Just because he managed to solve one disaster he wasn't going to ignore all caution and stay in the grass. Thor listened, a blissful smile on his face.

Once they were standing, leaving the awkward sitting positions, Loki laid his arms on Thor's shoulders and pulled him in again. He carefully drew Thor's lips open and then slipped in his tongue, too curious to stay put. It didn't take Thor long to return the gesture. He pulled Loki even closer, holding him by his hips and he kissed with such passion that Loki thought he would go mad from the sensation.

They stood there, together, in they rays of the setting sun. For they first time in centuries they were both perfectly happy, their deepest wishes coming true, finding exactly what they were searching for in each other. In that moment, everything was perfect.

When they finally parted, both slightly out of breath, the sun just slipped behind the horizon and the sky darkened. They were reluctant to move; even though they were both aware they still had a distance to travel.

Thor sighed and said: "And here I thought I would be the first to kiss you."

Loki's eyebrows rose. "You are far from the first person to kiss me."

"I didn't want to know that," complained Thor, though he never stopped smiling. "That's not what I meant. I wanted to make our first kiss special for you. What I get now is the third one..."

Loki laughed and quickly kissed Thor, lips on lips.

"Fourth one," corrected Thor, faking frustrated tone.

"Oh good, you can count to four," remarked Loki playfully.

Then Thor kissed him and somehow it was even better than before. And Loki realized that he found a clear answer to one of his earlier doubts. Any problems caused by this would be definitely worth it. With Thor so close, Loki felt ready to overcome just about anything.

The rational part of his mind desperately tried to remind him that he was only drunk on emotions, but it was completely ignored. Just for the moment, there were no problems to worry about.

* * *

**Note: I know next to nothing about snake bites. Thor and Loki are canonicaly immune to poisons anyway. So I'm breaking rules of both, the actual universe and the fictional one as well. Meh. I'm also shipping gods, so who cares?**


	5. The Prey and the Predator

**The Prey and the Predator**

The sun was gone but the land still glimmered in twilight, as the light reflected off the surface of the two planets. Everything had a purple and gold touch to it, the colors of the two cosmic colossi. It created a strange magical atmosphere, beautiful and peaceful.

The two princes paid no heed to it, too lost in each other to notice their surroundings. Before they stopped kissing and opened their eyes again, the planets hid in shadows and the light was gone, abandoning the world in darkness.

They stayed embracing for a while after their lips parted, breathing the same air, enjoying the same warm feeling in their chest.

Thor didn't want to move. Some part of him fiercely believed that if he let this moment go, if he allowed Loki to slip from his grasp, it would never return. It felt too good to be true and he never wanted to wake up from this dream.

Loki let Thor support some of his weight, feeling tired after the whole emotional frenzy. He didn't even have the control to be subtle about it. "We should probably settle for the night," he suggested.

That reminded Thor that even though he refused to acknowledge it just a moment ago, there really was a world around them.

"Here?" he asked, looking around the meadow, though in the dark he could recognize only outlines.

"No, we are _not _lying down in the grass again," said Loki.

"Right. You might want to enlighten me about what happened earlier."

"Alright," Loki had no problem with leaving the moment behind. He had no intention of hiding his feelings now and was going to go with it all the way, despite anything his mind had to say about it. He let go of Thor and waited for him to do the same.

"Oh, but don't think I'm done with you," said Thor in his usual teasing tones as he let him go.

"Even if you were, _I'm_ still not done with you," responded Loki immediately, in similarly bright tones.

"You better not be."

"Have no plans on it."

They grinned at each other and then set off in the direction of the forest. The edge of it was still a short distance away. Meanwhile Loki explained what happened and how he managed to cure the poison. He didn't mention anything about how he had felt. Thor saw the state he had been in.

And the kiss spoke louder than words anyway.

* * *

The fact how easily Loki had fallen asleep indicated that he really was tired. Thor was having a much harder time relaxing.

They were lying on the forest ground, with no fireplace because it was already too dark to go searching for branches and stones to build one. They kept their clothes on, putting down only their armor like they were used to.

They had spent some time teasing each other. Loki's fingers found their way even under Thor's clothes but eventually they agreed they won't go there just yet. Naturally Loki had some comments about it, pretending to be upset about going to sleep without 'a bedtime story'. When Thor bit his neck in response the moan Loki gave him was the most beautiful sound he had ever heard.

Thor felt so happy, he believed he would burst. Loki was _his_. The perfect pale skin, the soft elegant body, the shy affection hidden in the depths of the emerald eyes. It was all his to explore and adore. Thor never felt this _ecstatic_ over anything and it made him feel lightheaded and _wonderful_.

He told himself he wasn't going to rush this. He wanted Loki to see that this was much more than physical attraction.

Thor's fingers lightly brushed over Loki's skin, gently, so he wouldn't wake him up. He felt content with simply lying there and marveling at the beauty in front of him.

A wind softly whispered through the leaves, branches occasionally clashed against each other, but otherwise the forest was quiet. A twig cracked somewhere nearby. Thor didn't pay any attention to it, thinking about dreams and reality.

Then a rustling sound interrupted his thoughts. There was something moving somewhere very close to them. He remembered the fire meant for keeping away wild beasts and their lack of it and his peaceful resting was at once over as adrenaline rushed in his veins.

He sat up, bending his legs under him, so he could spring up into upright position if needed, and carefully scanned their surroundings. For a moment, the sounds stopped, as if in response to his sudden movement. A few second later they returned, discreet snaps and shuffles, moving through the forest just beyond what Thor could see.

The darkness was too deep. Thor could hardly see Mjölnir when he straightened up and called it to his hand. His eyes snapped from tree trunks to bushes to ground, but he couldn't see anything. For a moment it almost seemed as if the sounds had no origin because there simply _wasn't _anything in the direction where they came from. He considered that he would simply go and look, most probably scaring the animal away.

Then his eyes slipped down to sleeping Loki. Some part of him immediately objected to the prospect of moving even just a few steps away and leaving Loki behind, alone in the dark.

A distant howl rose over the woods, echoing between the trees. The mysterious beast stopped moving. The forest fell completely silent, as if every living creature in it startled at the wail. Loki softly murmured something and rolled over to his other side, not awoken by the howl.

Then Thor heard a frantic sound of something rushing though the undergrowth away from them. Soon enough the forest regained its calm quietness. Thor stayed on his guard for a while, waiting and watching the forest patiently. It felt right to be the one to keep watch while Loki rested.

The warm feeling in his chest kept him awake for another half an hour, but nothing strange or suspicious happened and he started feeling rather tired then. He shot one last searching glare to the surrounding forest and then put Mjölnir down.

Loki was smiling softly in his sleep. That meant he wasn't having nightmares. Thor smiled at the sight and once again lied down next to him, hugging him lightly from one side. He finally allowed his eyes shut, though he stayed listening intently for a while before sleep finally claimed him.

* * *

Loki woke up feeling warm and safe. He was curled up to Thor's side, his face bored in the curve of his neck. He didn't move, simply enjoying the comfort for a while. The rest of the universe seemed so distant when he had everything he needed right in front of him. For a few seconds he ever dared dream that they would never need to get up. They could lie here for eternity, until Jotunheim crumbled to dust and golden halls of Asgard rusted.

Then Thor woke up. He tilted his head slightly, to peer at Loki. His younger brother gave him a lazy smile.

"Good morning," said Thor.

"There, now you've done it," murmured Loki in response and shifted to support his weight on his elbows. "You've woken me up."

"But-" Any more words about how Loki had already been awake and Thor didn't do anything and this didn't make any sense were silenced when Loki's lips closed upon Thor's, putting his tongue to a much better use.

Loki didn't move away after the kiss, nibbling softly at Thor's lips, lost in thoughts and the wonderful feeling in his chest. How wasn't sure how long they stayed that way, lazing around, letting their thought wander, but then he noticed that Thor stopped responding, his expression turning startled and guilty.

"What is it?" asked Loki, immediately turning serious. For a moment, he wondered if he did something wrong. He withdrew and sat back on his haunches, watching Thor.

Thor also got himself up to a sitting position. He seemed reluctant to answer, obviously ashamed. "I just thought... Err, do you think Heimdal can see us?"

Loki laughed. Thor's expression immediately relaxed, even though the uncomfortable feeling that seized him when the thought occurred to him didn't go away.

"Is loving me such a shame to you?" asked Loki. In the end of the day, this _was_ the miserable little him being loved by the wonderful and glorious Thor, though his tone didn't betray his thoughts.

"No, of course not," said Thor slightly frantically. The least thing he wanted was for Loki to somehow take this the wrong way. "It just... The idea that he's watching us, you know..."

Loki laughed again, when he saw how lost for words Thor was, trying to explain something Loki could understand perfectly fine without any words at all. He was probably being mean, but teasing Thor was so much fun, he couldn't stop himself. "There are so many things Heimdal has already seen you do. I think I can safely leave the worst of them to your imagination. And yet you seem to draw the line at _kissing_ _me._ How exactly am I supposed to _not _take this personally?" He grinned evilly, while Thor grew even more frantic.

"It's not because it's you! It's just that when we're the Princes of Asgard and... brothers. I- I mean not that I have any problem with that, but other people... I just thought what if he told mother and father, because really, I haven't thought about them at all... I- I mean not that that's any problem, it wouldn't really change anything if they disapproved but..."

He stopped only when Loki pressed a finger to his lips. He looked up to his younger brother with uncertain eyes.

"You make an excellent point," said Loki courtly, his eyes shining with laughter even as he put on a serious face. "What other people think and say about you, about us, is indeed very important and should be regulated. There are simply things that should never reach the public, yes?"

Thor pushed away his hand, to free his mouth, frowning. "That's not precisely what I meant..."

He never really thought about whether or not he would be ready to stand in front of the world and admit that he's in love with his brother. He knew for sure that he wasn't going to let other people's opinions mess with his own, but when it came to confessing things, maybe it would be better if there weren't any opinions to begin with. Only when it was said like that it just sounded... wrong.

"Pity. I was about to congratulate you that you may grow up into a politician after all."

Yes, definitely wrong.

"Don't make that face. There's nothing _wrong_ with that," the amusement was clear in Loki's voice now.

Thor shook his head. The message was clear. The thought of Heimdal watching over them shouldn't have made him feel uncomfortable. Heimdal at least wasn't one to gossip and their parents would have to find out eventually anyway...

Loki watched him intently for a few moments. Finally it seemed he was done with the teasing. His voice turned kind: "Thor?"

He waited until Thor looked up at him, still frowning slightly, but obviously trying his best to hide it.

"Heimdal didn't see us."

At that moment, there were no other words that Thor wished to hear more. He immediately felt a wave of relief. He hated the prospect that the whole Asgard would frown at them in their absence. When there was someone who disapproved of his actions, Thor preferred to look the person in the eye. He hated being judged behind his back and thus unable to fight back.

"How?" he asked, because even as he allowed the relief to sweep over him, he wondered. He was ready to believe Loki without hesitation, but there was still everything he knew about Heimdal against this statement that sounded very much like wishful thinking.

Loki put on his best winning smile: "Magic."

Thor snorted. "You don't say. But _how_? Did you create an illusion or something?"

Loki let himself feel pleased that Thor was curious about how magic works, something he rarely bothered with before. But then again he most probably asked only to see if Loki can give a satisfactory explanation that would prove his statement trustworthy.

"No, it would be too difficult to set up an illusion like that. We are talking about a being that can see everything at once at all times. If I was casting an illusion Heimdal would still see us – the version of us which I would choose to project for him. To keep up the illusion with all its details for so long would be extremely bothersome." He knew he shouldn't give out spare information. Answer the question and move on was generally the rule he followed in most conversations, but it was hard to not get excited about telepathy because works of the mind were always one of his favourite subjects. "Instead I simply created a mental shield to hide us from his gaze. Heimdal generally sees by tapping into the consciousness of every living being in the realms. At once. I'm not completely sure how he does _that_, but I understand the principle. Anyway, there are different types of mental protection, naturally. Most of them would be useless in this case, because they can still be seen - the person trying to get to your mind would still be aware of you, even if they couldn't reach your thoughts. This one hides not only thoughts, but the mind itself. It makes him unable to reach us, leaving him completely blind as to our location and actions."

It added to his credit that Thor actually appeared to think about it and didn't wave it immediately off as a good enough explanation. Meanwhile Loki looked up to the sky. The sun was way above horizon now. They weren't in danger of coming late anywhere, but he still felt an impulse to continue moving. Maybe it was because he preferred when they talked while they were walking, so it made sense to move while they had something to talk about.

He caught Thor's eyes, moved his head slightly and the agreement was reached. They both got up, put on their armor and finally set off.

"So you just choose the moments when you don't want him to see us?" asked Thor then. "Wouldn't it seem a bit suspicious to him that we completely dropped off the face of the world only to randomly reappear later?" He paused, then quickly added: "Heimdal can't hear us _now_, can he?"

"Good thinking," allowed Loki. "Of course I wouldn't do that sort of mistake. It would scream at him to try and find out what am I trying to hide. No, I hid us for the whole duration of this journey."

Thor frowned. "You did?"

Loki shot him a questioning look at that. "Anything wrong?"

"Well," Thor couldn't even begin to understand the consequences of such a notion. "How could you possibly know from the start that there will be something that you'd like to hide from Heimdal?" Was this all part of some plan? Was Loki playing him somehow? It was absurd, he didn't believe it, but at the same time it was the logical conclusion...

And the calculating look Loki shot him wasn't exactly reassuring.

Loki originally cast the shielding spell purely out of spite. When he realized that Heimdal intentionally altered their destination out of his loyalty to Odin it came to him as a natural reaction. If Asgard wanted to be rid of them so badly, they could just as well stop prying.

If he wanted to tell Thor that though, he would have to explain why was it that their presence wasn't wanted in Asgard, which would lead to a second round of making Thor choose between him and Odin. He wasn't in the mood for such things.

"It wasn't intentional. I set up the barrier because I had just recently learned how to do it and I wanted to try it out. We are lucky that it just happened to serve our purpose."

Thor exhaled audibly. He stayed quiet for a while, his eyes searching the forest around them. Then he said offhandedly: "Right. So, how do you know it works if you didn't talk about it with Heimdal?"

Loki smirked. When he really tried, Thor actually could argue with him using logical arguments. "The future King of Asgard was bitten by a poisonous snake and the whole kingdom entrusted his useless younger brother, not a healing professional, to save his life," he said. "_Or_ did they simply not know that their Prince was in danger? Which one is more likely?"

When he thought about it, the prospect of being rid of Heimdal's gaze forever appeared promising but it had its downsides. Once they returned to Asgard, he would have to remove it. He couldn't be so selfish as to withhold the safety it provided for Thor. It really was his fault that Thor ever was in any danger at all. He hadn't remembered to remove the spell then and he wasn't going to do it now, but after this was over... Thor could always use someone watching over him.

"The younger brother isn't useless," was Thor's conclusion.

"That's irrelevant," said Loki, smirking, though his heart immediately warmed up at the show of care.

"No, it isn't," argued Thor, frowning disapprovingly. He couldn't remember a time when Loki would degrade himself so readily _without _talking about his Frost Giant blood. Usually he appeared so confident, even cocky.

"The _point_ that I was trying to make, but which you chose to disregard, was that if Heimdal _could_ see you dying from blood poisoning, he wouldn't just idly sit by -" Before Loki could finish, Thor suddenly reached out for him, grabbing him by his shoulders and pressing him against a trunk of the nearest tree. Loki only had enough time to yelp in surprise before Thor claimed his mouth, kissing him in that wild passionate way of his that was completely irresistible.

When he could finally speak, Loki tried to make his voice stern and disapproving, but somehow he just couldn't stop smiling: "And what was _that_ all about?"

Thor still held him with his back firmly pressed against the tree. "_That_," he empathized, "was a kiss for a younger brother who isn't useless."

Loki stared at him in astonishment.

"Say it," Thor's voice lowered into deep threatening growl. Loki's blood nearly boiled in his veins at the sound of it; it was so enchanting, like the most beautiful sound he has ever heard. He would do anything this voice would ask him to do. Even lie.

"Alright, the younger brother isn't _completely_ useless. He just isn't the sort of professional one would prefer to have present in case of emergency."

"Mm," Thor leaned in and Loki prepared to accept his kiss. But then the older brother halted and stayed, teasing Loki softly around one corner of his mouth with his tongue. "You're getting there."

Loki made an impatient sound, his whole body aching to respond to the touch. "What do you want me to say?"

"The younger brother is incredibly talented and smart and he managed to save the older brother's life just like any professional healer would."

Loki gave a small laugh. He _so_ wasn't going to say that. "Well," he said softly instead, "it's not like he had a choice. The world you be an awful place without the older brother."

The simple words swayed Thor's heart and he felt an immediate desire to kiss Loki. Any rules he previously tried to set up didn't seem to matter anymore, overruled by the simple acknowledgement that he loved Loki and Loki loved him.

When the tips of their tongues met, Loki marked himself the winner of the game.

Any meaningful conversation was long lost on them, abandoned for the simple pleasure of kissing and petting each other. They were in no hurry.

They probably wouldn't have moved anywhere for long minutes if it wasn't for the smell of blood that filled the air and soft whimpering sounds that reached their ears. That pulled them out of their sweet oblivion and made them focus their attention to the surrounding forest. There was something moving though the undergrowth, mewling softly.

Thor recognized the footfall. It was very similar to the one he heard that night, when he was keeping guard. The memory evoked feeling of protection over Loki, and holding Loki like he did now, locked in his arms and backed against a tree trunk, only strengthened it. If it turned out this animal was dangerous, he was more than ready to protect what he held dear.

Only the cries the animal made didn't indicate that it was a vicious beast. It actually sounded pitiful, like a lost kitten. They caught a glimpse of something black between the trees, but then the animal gave one last desperate howl and collapsed down in the grass, disappearing from their sight once more.

Thor's arms let go of Loki and he turned to go and see what it was. Loki's voice stopped him.

"Wait, where are you going?"

He turned to see Loki with his arms crossed over his chest, leaning onto the tree and looking at him quizzically.

"You aren't curious about what that was?" said Thor.

"It was an injured animal. Since it paid no attention to where it was going, we can safely assume it didn't expect to live much longer. Why would I be curious about that?"

"Maybe it needs our help," suggested Thor and turned away, moving in the direction where he assumed he would find the animal.

Loki shook his head in disbelief, but then he reluctantly followed after Thor.

The grass all around it was covered in blood that poured from wounds on its chest and back of its neck. Its eyes barely moved to regard them. It was breathing in short gasps, trembling all over. It had canine features, very similar to a wolf. If it were standing, it would reach their tights. It had short, black fur that wetly glittered and long soft ears lying across its neck ruining the wolf-like appearance.

Thor stayed a few steps away, so as to not frighten it. It looked so miserable and hopeless...

"Any idea what it is?" he asked, when Loki stopped by his side a few seconds later and frowned at the creature.

"None. But if you hadn't-"

"If I hadn't invaded Muspelheim, you would know. Yes, I'm aware."

Loki smirked. "Good, you're catching on."

The animal looked so innocent, as it lay there unmoving, looking up at them. Its fur looked so soft and something about the way the long ears framed its face made it look adorable to Thor's eyes.

"Can you heal him?" he asked.

"Is my being professional healer canon now?" laughed Loki.

Thor looked at him expectantly.

"Wait, you are serious?" Loki once again shook his head in disbelief.

"Of course," Thor gave him a strange look.

"Why would you want to heal a random wounded animal you found in the woods?" It just didn't make sense.

"He is obviously in pain and looks like he could use our help. You do have enough magic to help him without problems, don't you?" Thor didn't see what it was that Loki was so reluctant about. It couldn't be simpler to help since this wouldn't even limit them in any way.

"I do," said Loki stubbornly. "So?"

"So it makes sense for us to help him."

"No, it doesn't. It's hardly our business that this thing got itself killed."

Thor had to do a double take to make sure Loki was serious, but the frown he wore left no doubts. "You don't feel sorry for him?"

Miserable little thing, obviously not even strong enough to survive on its own or fight for its flickering life. All Loki felt was contempt. "You want to help him because you pity him?"

"Well, yes. Because I see he needs help."

"How do you know it won't attack us once it has its strength back?"

"He wouldn't attack the people who helped him."

"But who does that? Walking around, searching for those who need help and helping them? What would even be the point?"

Thor was now looking at him, as if he saw him for the first time and Loki suddenly wanted to take the words back, even though he meant them.

"Good people do that," said Thor. "It's the right thing to do."

Loki simply stared at him for a few moments. Then he slowly moved towards the animal and his fingers lit up with magical energy. The animal didn't move, didn't even acknowledge his presence, still breathing heavily.

Of course it was the right thing to do. Of course it was. Only Loki never though about the right thing to do. It wasn't because he had any problems with doing the right thing; it just wasn't something he did. The thought simply never occurred to him, it never came. It didn't make sense, not really, not in the way he understood the world. Loki did things to help himself or those he cared about. Surely that was the way everyone else did it. He didn't care about a random animal that happened to cross their path and couldn't imagine why Thor would. There wasn't anything remarkable about it. It wouldn't even be useful to them. It was pathetic, unable to care for itself, thus born to die.

Thor kneeled down next to the creature and carefully reached out towards it. When it didn't react in any way other any look at him, he softly touched it, petting its head. It made another whimpering sound. Its breathing slowly calmed down, as the wound on its neck closed and disappeared.

Loki felt like he was suffocating, when the wolf lifted its head and licked Thor's hand affectionately. Before the injury on its chest was completely gone, it already tried to stand up, showing open fondness towards Thor, who never stopped petting it.

_Loki_ was born to die. Odin saved him, because he wanted to use him.

Thor would save him, because he _cared_.

Loki wanted to scream. There were no words to express the way he way feeling. It was so clear, so easy to see how heartless he was compared to Thor. Odin would never help anybody if he didn't have any benefit from it and nor would Loki. And as he watched Thor, he felt like crying. He suddenly realized that no matter how hard he tries, he could never completely grasp just how strong and beautiful and perfect Thor was for caring and loving where others only sought to abuse and gain advantage.

All reason insisted that this attitude should have destroyed Thor long ago. If you were being kind to ruthless monsters, you got torn to pieces. When you were naive, you got manipulated. When you offered help, others used you. That was what was happening between Thor and Odin, only Thor didn't know about it. And Loki himself sometimes used Thor's naiveté to control him, without any bad intentions. It simply came naturally, since Thor made himself a target. It made _sense_.

What didn't make sense was the scene right in front of him. Loki couldn't believe it even as he watched it, but here it was, clear as day. Giving love meant getting love, however improbable it seemed. The wolf didn't attack them after they helped it and Thor chose to help it, because he believed he should.

Thor noticed how silent and still Loki was and his face immediately showed concern. "Anything wrong? Did the healing exhaust you after all?"

_Doesn't the _caring _exhaust you? How come you never run out of benevolence if you are willing to throw it around like this?_ thought Loki in response. But out loud he said only: "I'm fine."

Thor's eyes carefully studied him, in a futile attempt to guess if he's telling the truth, but couldn't come anywhere near to grasping the situation. "If you're sure, then I say we should go on. There's no need to linger here."

Loki complied, not meeting Thor's eyes. He always knew that Thor was this way. He always admired it about him. And yet all he needed was to think about it again and it completely amazed him.

"Good boy," said Thor to the wolf kindly, when he patted his head one last time. "Now go and stay out of trouble." But when he turned and started walking away, the dark wolf immediately followed after him, with silly happy expression that was somehow amplified by the long dark ears that hung at the sides of its face.

_Once you've showed him a spark of light, he refuses to return to the darkness,_ thought Loki, watching the scene quietly with keen interest. What was the right thing to do when others started clinging to your kindness?

"Don't you have a pack to return to?" offered Thor gently, lifting his eyes away from the wolf only to search for a way between trees as he walked, Loki steadily at his one side and the animal at the other one. "Maybe a family? Friends? Some place you call home?"

The longer Loki watched on, the surer he was that while being kind was undoubtedly the right thing to do, it definitely wasn't the smartest thing to do. It was still endearing and in certain way admirable, but Loki wasn't going to follow Thor's example.

Teasing Thor was so much more fun. "You expect him to answer?"

Thor didn't react to the remark. He kept talking to the animal. "We were happy to help you, but now it's time for us to be on our way. You can't come with us. We are on an important mission and it could be dangerous."

"We mostly walk all day."

"Yes, that's right." Thor didn't even lose a beat and his tone didn't waver, when he abruptly changed his words. "You would be terribly bored with us. You should probably run and hunt or do something that you usually do."

"Like getting yourself killed."

"I said _usually_," objected Thor incredulously.

"I know you did." If the animal was incompetent enough to let it happen to it once, then one could be sure it wouldn't be able to prevent it from happening again.

Thor groaned and looked at Loki, frustration clear on his face now. "You _want_ him to come with us or what?"

"No, that would be unacceptable. We don't want an audience. I only enjoy watching your persuasion skills in action."

"You've been ruining all of my best attempts!"

"That's what makes it so enjoyable."

Their canine acquaintance meanwhile skipped happily around them, completely oblivious to their conversation, as if it didn't concern him at all.

Thor was quiet for a moment, frowning in thought. Then his face lit up. "Maybe he could come with us after all. I always wanted to have a hound."

"What for?"

"Hunting, mostly." Thor reached out towards the animal and gently rubbed one of its long soft ears in his hand. "And cuddling." He shot Loki a knowing smile.

"Why would you need a dog for that?"

"That's right. I've got _you _for that, don't I?"

"Yeah, I imagine you drag me around all the time only to have me hunt for you."

Thor chuckled and pulled Loki in for a quick kiss. "I meant the cuddling, you smartarse."

The black wolf ran a few paces ahead of them, but when they stopped, he returned, watching them with expression one could interpret as disapproval. Thor's eyes fell down towards him.

"What do you say? Do you want to be our hunter?" he asked cheerfully.

"Stop talking to him like he can answer you," murmured Loki under his breath, but he was in too good a mood to feel annoyed.

Instead of answering, the animal once again ran a few steps away and then returned. It only seemed pleased when they once again started walking.

"I'm going to call him Hemmerli," said Thor.

Loki snorted. "Right. _Little hammer_. Very original. I don't know what I expected."

Thor smiled at him. "I think it sounds cute, don't you?"

"Where's the _striking fear in the hearts of your enemies_ part?"

"That's for weapons. He's our hunter."

"I bet he can't hunt."

"Oh, don't be so pessimistic. I think he's following a scent right now."

Thor was right about that. Their animal companion stopped a few yards ahead and bent down to smell the ground. He searched for a few moments and then lifted his head to look back at them. When he made sure they were following him, he ran about a yard further and sniffed again.

Loki had to admit to being surprised. He refused to believe that they could ever make wild animal work for them simply by asking nicely, but there seemed to be little explanation to what the wolf was doing other than tracking prey. Or maybe it just so happened that they were talking about hunting at the same time when he decided he was hungry and wanted to catch something.

Hemmerli lead them through the forest, disappearing between the trees and reappearing again moment later with impatient expression, running ahead and returning, making little whining noises when it took them too long to make their way through thorny bushes that he had only jumped over. They sped up their pace. They weren't running, but it wasn't a stroll anymore either.

Some time later Thor spoke up again, his overly thoughtful tone indicating that he was joking. "Who knew that wolfs make for such wonderful sleuthhounds?"

Loki snorted. "He's not a wolf, remember? We don't know anything about his species. For all we know, this is their customary hunting method." Though he had been wondering as well. How far and long was this animal willing to pursue before finally catching something?

As they continued, they noticed something between the trees ahead. It was a stone wall, overgrown with vines and bushes. As they neared, they recognized more walls and even some passages. There were trees growing all around and even inside the walls because there was no roof. It was probably a ruin of some fort or castle. The forest had long ago retaken its territory, but there was nothing and no one to take down the walls.

It seemed highly unlikely that they would find their pray in there. Any ordinary animal would avoid the place, instinctively expecting to find dead end between the walls.

"I believe I won a bet," said Loki.

Hemmerli ran straight towards it. He stopped at one entrance and looked back at them expectantly. When he saw that they had stopped, he immediately ran back to cuddle Thor's leg and then returned to the chosen entrance, whining all the time, as if he was begging them to go in with him.

"He wants to show us something," observed Thor.

"What could it be? Maybe the enemy who nearly killed him before, in hopes that we will take care of it for him?"

Thor smiled confidently. "I hope so!"

Loki was entirely sure that he was making the wrong decision, even as he moved forward to follow the dark animal between the thick stone walls. He was too curious to turn away and powerless to turn _Thor _away.

Hemmerli rewarded their decision with more cuddling and soft whimpering. They entered what used to be a room, now with trampled ground in place of floor, occasional trees and the open sky as a roof. They crossed it and stepped though a hole in the wall. It led to a corridor that divided into two, but their canine guide never hesitated in choosing one of the directions. They followed along a pathway that he had chosen.

When he disappeared behind a corner, they obediently followed after him. Then they stopped abruptly. The path in front of then disappeared underground. The stone walls ended here, making way for a natural cave that opened here to the world on the surface. They could see only a short distance inside, enough only to recognize the cave walls and ground leading downhill from then into complete darkness.

Hemmerli's dark coat made him nearly invisible in the dark and they recognized him only when he returned to ensure they would continue following.

"I feel that we are getting sidetracked here," said Loki when he skeptically looked over the cave entrance and the dark wolf that waited with expectant expression at the brink of the light. "We are getting no closer to Swafd while we chase after mad animals and their evil nemeses."

"This way it's more exciting," Thor pointed out.

"Not really. All I see is a dark cave. Nothing exciting about this."

"It will get exciting once we find out what it is he wants to show us so badly," said Thor and followed in after the wolf, making sure not to slip on the uneven ground.

Loki feigned a sigh, but there would be no use in stopping now. An animal was leading them with surprising certainty to some old castle's underground vault and he knew he could never rest if he didn't find out what it was all supposed to mean.

As he descended into darkness, he lifted his left hand and created a steady glow of golden light, while his right hand reached for Sannindi's handle. He made sure that he saw both sides of the cave, so no shadows could move out of his field of vision and only then he proceeded down the tunnel after Thor, who praised him for the light.

They continued for some time though the darkness, every few yards of so encouraged by Hemmerli, who kept shooting them pleased glances and nuzzle their legs.

After a few turns the tunnel expanded into a room, too big for Loki's light to reach the edges of. He considered coming up with a spell that would allow him to illuminate the whole place, but his thoughts were interrupted when Hemmerli suddenly stopped and howled.

His wail was rejoined by others that echoed throughout the cave, more than one could count. They found themselves surrounded by about a dozen of dark animals, with tick muscles under their skin, battle scars all over their bodies and sharp fangs meant for tearing at flesh. The soft long ears that hung at both sides of their faces failed to make them look any less menacing. They circled around the field of light, only shadows at the brink of their vision, but Loki had a feeling that there were more of them than they could see, just beyond the edge of darkness.

"Hemmerli?" called Thor in a dark tone, one that promised a world of pain to whoever would dare disobey him. "If we are still friends, I suggest you call off your family. We wouldn't want something happening to them now, would we?"

Their former ally only bristled and growled in response, showing off his fangs. His whole posture screamed open hostility. There were no signs for the whiny and friendly personality he had shown them before.

Loki didn't need to see more to know what it meant, even as he faltered to believe it. "We've been _manipulated_ by an _animal_."

Then the shadows attacked them.


End file.
